PLEASE HELP ME!!! HAND PAIN!!!

Well, if it hurts you're doing something wrong. Exactly what's wrong is hard to diagnose from text - if you can get pictures, that would help. It would also help to have a better description of the pain - is it just in the pinky? or is it also in the side of your fretting hand?

But from what you describe, here's my best guesses on what to fix:

PICK: there's no "right" way. Watch a video of Pat Metheney - now there's a guy with an odd pick grip, but it hasn't held him back. That said, most pro guitarists (95+%) hold the pick the same way, and it takes some getting used to.

Start by curling your fingers like you're going to make a fist, but stop when the first joint of the index finger is parallel to the back of your hand. Lay the pick on top of your index finger so the point of the pick is perpendicular to your fingernail. Now put your thumb over the pick so it's in line with the first joint of the index finger.

This should leave about 1/4" or so of pick sticking out. The advantages of this grip: there's a lot of "meat" of your fingers on the pick, so you're less likely to have it slipping around. Your pick isn't sticking out very much, which keeps your hand close to the strings - which is good for control. And it's easy to make small adjustments to get effects like pinch harmonics.

PINKY: You'll have the most reach when your fingers are roughly parallel to the frets. This means getting the peghead up pretty high - many good players keep the peghead at about shoulder height (and most beginners keep it way too low). Also be sure you're not angling the face of the guitar so you can see the frets - you should be finding the frets by feel, and the face of the guitar should be nearly vertical.

PRESSURE: you don't need much - just enough to get the notes to sound cleanly. Extra pressure can make the notes sound slightly sharp, and they'll slow you down - the tension created in your fretting hand is the enemy of speed development.

PICK GRIP: I actually control dynamics through pick grip - if your picking motion is consistent, the tighter you grip the pick, the more energy is transferred to the string. For moderato playing, I'm fairly relaxed... for piano/pianissimo I have a very light grip, and I just tighten it up to get forte/fortissimo. This has the advantage of not putting tension in your picking arm (again, the enemy of speed)... but it takes a fair bit of practice and experimentation to get the hang of. Our natural inclination is to hit the strings harder for louder sounds, but I find changing the strength of the pick grip gives me better control - and a broader range of dynamics.

Hope that helps.

I agree with NoteBoat. Could be you are holding the headstock too low. And if you wrap your thumb over the top this will greatly decrease your reach. Place your thumb behind the neck pointing toward the headstock as in this picture:

This guy has his guitar up high as Noteboat mentioned. His thumb is behind the neck. This will cause your fretting fingers to be parallel to the frets as he mentioned.

Now, that said, there are times to wrap your thumb over the top of the neck, especially when bending a string.

This is fine when you are bending strings, but when playing scales your reach will be greatly decreased. This could be why your index finger raises when you try to use your pinky. Try keeping your thumb behind the neck, then all fingers will remain about the same distance from the strings.

As far as holding the pick, if your index finger strikes the strings before the pick then you need to change your technique. Or, you could use one of the large triangular picks Fender makes.

Fender triangle pick

These picks are very large and take a little getting used to, but they will keep your fingers a distance from the strings, should eliminate striking the strings with your fingers. Carlos Santana used to use these picks. You can see the large pick from 1:16 to 1:21 in this famous Woodstock video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8JryQXilMj4&feature=related

I'm in the same camp as NoteBoat and Wes. It may not LOOK cool, but getting that guitar into a proper playing position, and using proper hand placement can save you a lot of pain years down the road. I've been playing 43 years, and I bless my guitar teacher for being such a tyrant about hand position every time I read something like this.

Wes had a photo showing the back view of the neck. Here's a shot from my last performance showing me "modeling" a front view . . .

beginners press far too hard. and they press the string onto the fret instead of behind it.
after thirteen years you probably don't do that.
ageing can cause pain. not so much from repititive stuff but from old joints, arthritus etc.
posture and pressure are very important with guitar.
the above posts will set you straight.

Big ditto from The Cat. Mine hurt like Hades, thanks to arthritis. I play lightly, in any case, which should help anyone with pain...

Cat