I just love jokes about musicians. Thought it would be cool if we posted our favorites. I'll start:
Little Johnny proudly said to his mother, "Mommy, when I grow up I want to be a musician!"
His mother answered him, "Now Johnny, be realistic; you know you can't do both."
Regards,
Mike
"Growing Older But Not UP!"
Q: How does a Lead Guitarist change a lightbulb ?
A: He holds it and the world revolves around him.
It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.
Q: How many bass players does it take to change a lightbulb ?
A: None. The Lead player can do it with his teeth.
with sincere apologies, no offense intended!
Q: What do you call a person who hangs out with musicians?
A: A drummer.
I've got two for ya:
1. What's the difference between a guitar player and a mutual fund?
a: The mutual fund will eventually mature and earn money.
2. What's the difference between a drummer and a large pizza?
a: The large pizza can feed a family of four.
with sincere apologies, no offense intended!
Q: What do you call a person who hangs out with musicians?
A: A drummer.
Q: What do you call a drummer who loses one stick?
A: A conductor
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Jimmy decides to take up the bass. Comes home from his first lesson...
Father: What did you learn at your lesson today?
Jimmy: I learned how to play root notes
Next week Jimmy comes home....
Father: What did you learn at your lesson today?
Jimmy: I learned how to play the fifths
Next week Jimmy comes home....
Father: What did you learn at your lesson today?
Jimmy: I don't have time for lessons anymore. I've got too many gigs.
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Musical jokes?
Britney Spears, live in concert?
"Be good at what you can do" - Fingerbanger"
I have always felt that it is better to do what is beautiful than what is 'right'" - Eliot Fisk
Wedding music and guitar lessons in Essex. Listen at: http://www.rollmopmusic.co.uk
Awww . . . now, Alan . . . play nice.
It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.
Equal opportunity humor:
Q: How do you get a guitarist to stop playing?
A: Give him sheet music.
Q: How do you get a keyboardist to stop playing?
A: Take away his sheet music.
Q: What's the hardest three years of a drummer's life?
A: 2nd grade.
Q: What did the drummer get on his IQ test?
A: Drool.
Q: How many country bass players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Five. One. Five. One.
Q: How does a bass player count 7/8 time?
A: 1-2-3-4-5-6-sev-en
Q: What's the definition of an optimist?
A: A musician with a mortgage.
Kenny G walks into an elevator and says, "Man, this place is HAPPENING!"
Q: How many jazz musician jokes are there?
A: Just one -- all the rest are true!
:note2:
What's perfect pitch?
When you chuck a trombone into a skip without it touching the sides.
I started with nothing - and I've still got most of it left.
Did you know that the word "gullible" is not in any dictionary?
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