This is an interesting one I threw together. Taken from an armfull of lyrics done at the train station. No idea of a backing at this moment in time. Rock but turns emo at some points.
Ambience
Here I am, On my knees,
Projecting my voice into the darkness,
This sensation clawing down my spine,
Severing the links that bind me,
You turned your backs,
Unaware I was burning inside,
Denied my existence,
Refused to believe,
Forgotten past,
Hopeless future,
Lost memories,
Found realization,
On the brink of emptiness,
Moving towards the void,
Converged thoughts,
Sign to paradise is fading,
Ambience, Remembrance,
The voice upon the wind,
Tranquility pulsating into my veins,
Becoming one with my mind,
Moment's approaching,
The sun is dawning,
Sign to paradise is fading,
The ambience remains,
I liked your other song better. The message was clearer and flowed better.
Since I always pick on one line I suggest that this line:
This sensation clawing down my spine,
Be changed to:
This sensation crawling down my spine,
I'm gonna pick on the line too ... muahah. :)
Maybe "filing down my spine" ... as in wearing it down therefore severing it as in the next line.
Also, "The sun is dawning"...
That didn't seem to fit with the rest of the song. I envisioned a man with his world falling around him and turning black, but still an ambience remains ... maybe the other people on the train?
Anyways .. it felt like the sun should be setting or dimming out ... therefore the "sign to paradise" fading out ...
