My Heart Spilled Before the Eyes of The Crows

This song is goes to the tune of the song "Come Clarity" by the band In Flames. I would appreciate some comments, thanx.

My Heart Spilled Before the Eyes of The Crows

I can die
a million times
But none of these have crossed my fears
So when you came
and jumped my heart
The downward spiral was about to start

You believe that you saved me,
but when you wake up my eyes are still not there
When you cried I thought you left me
Still the pain it always lingers near

My soul has died
A million times
Spreads like cancer killing all it finds
Time after time
My shadow watched
Leaving you to add the final touch

You believe that you saved me,
but when you wake up my eyes are still not there
When you cried I thought you left me
Still the pain it always lingers near

Falling down without a way to get back up
I'm staggering
Lost under an anomaly
Forever changing with the wind
Blowing skies across a demons heart

And now my pride
Stabbed time after time
Swallowed hard to keep you at my side
But when you stole
My lasting life
I shed a one tear then faded away

You believe that you saved me,
but when you wake up my eyes are still not there
When you cried I thought you left me
Still the pain it always lingers near