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Untitled a sof yet PLEASE HELP!!

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(@panchromatic)
Active Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 5
Topic starter  

The world is a canvas
the world is a stage
The world is inconsequential
The world is grey
(paint my tradgedies away)

chorus-I am alone alone
alive
I am alone afraid
to die
I am alone alone
alive
I am the moth on the windowpane

Awoken again
Children if the ashes
Fallen from the heavens
Haunting, alone together
together
we say
alone

(repeat chorus)
bridge- The skies fall at your command at our command they fall

Without a doubt, very different from what I normally write. COMPLETELY random inspiration, I haven't posted in a while, but I've got a tune for this and everything.

Oh I'm gonna buy this place and start a fire/ Stand here until I hear all your heart's desires/
/Because I'm gonna buy this place and see it burn/ And do back all it did to you in return - Coldplay


   
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(@dirtgrrl)
Active Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 14
 

I don't know, hey. I think the song may be a little too non-sequetor for my liking. I just can't get a grasp of what you are trying to say. Perhaps this is the style that you intended on writing in (a dream-pop kinda thing), but personally I need more information in the lyrics to help paint a picture in my head of what the song's about. It's as though the song consists purely of imagery, which may make sense for you, but simply confuses the listener who needs SOME kind of linear structure to it. These are just my thoughts...I don't know. What genre are you writing in?


   
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(@alangreen)
Member
Joined: 22 years ago
Posts: 5342
 

I'm struggling to get hold of it. Any chance we could get to listen?

A :-)

"Be good at what you can do" - Fingerbanger"
I have always felt that it is better to do what is beautiful than what is 'right'" - Eliot Fisk
Wedding music and guitar lessons in Essex. Listen at: http://www.rollmopmusic.co.uk


   
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