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Come To Town (Original) (NOW FINISHED)

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elpantalla
(@elpantalla)
Posts: 271
Honorable Member
Topic starter
 

Hey, I finally wrote another original. You guys have been wanting me to. I really like this one. It is about aliens coming to earth and dancing in the streets. I think it's nice.

I just recorded the bridge a few minutes ago. Hope you like it!

Bust a move.

http://bonusnoise.dmusic.com

It's called Come To Town

One chord is fine.
Two you're pushing it.
Three and you're into jazz.

 
Posted : 20/11/2007 4:36 pm
cnev
 cnev
(@cnev)
Posts: 4459
Famed Member
 

E,

Great job, sounds great and has a nice groove. Be killer with some drums and bass. The only part that i was unsure of was the little riff/progression you do after you sing "get down" it starts to go in one direction and then changes and to me it doesn't fit the groove that well. I wish I could describe what I mean better. My ears are expecting the riff to resolve to something and then when I don't hear it, it sounds odd.

Anyway great tune great voice keep it up.

"It's all about stickin it to the man!"
It's a long way to the top if you want to rock n roll!

 
Posted : 20/11/2007 4:48 pm
Dneck
(@dneck)
Posts: 630
Prominent Member
 

Hey, I like this a lot. I see what cnev is saying about the riff after get down. Its not that it doesn't work, but it is not what I would have played (where as in most other parts including the lead at the beginning you sound very intentional)

Great job your stuff is some of the best on here I think.

Some constructive criticism, with both your covers and your original music your influences are very apparent. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but you might think about branching out a little into some styles out of your comfort zone. You learn a lot about melody writing if you learn things like bach partitas, jazz melodies, folk music, and the blues. Even if your not going to try to write in those styles you'd be amazed what it will do when you turn around and try to write a song of your own.

"And above all, respond to all questions regarding a given song's tonal orientation in the following manner: Hell, it don't matter just kick it off!"
-Chris Thile

 
Posted : 20/11/2007 5:25 pm
KR2
 KR2
(@kr2)
Posts: 2717
Famed Member
 

Wow! I haven't been on the board that long to hear a lot of songs but that one was the BEST I've heard.
Most excellent.
Kinda funny because I just uploaded my first video (to the Beginners Videos) of House of the Rising Sun yesterday and I did it to that same beat ( or strumming pattern) of your song.
Maybe that's why I liked it so much. LOL
Anyway, great job. I'd buy the finished version.

If the Movie "Men in Black" was looking for a theme song, they couldn't have found a better one.
Just thinking . . .
There's a series called "Torchwood". . . . a British production . . . by the same people who do "Doctor Who".
Get in touch with them! They would love this! It's a great background song for their type of production.

Are you thinking of adding a keyboardist to your group? I think it would be an excellent addition.

It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.

 
Posted : 20/11/2007 5:44 pm
elpantalla
(@elpantalla)
Posts: 271
Honorable Member
Topic starter
 

Actually, It's not a group, haha.

It's just me, I do all the instruments and stuff.

One chord is fine.
Two you're pushing it.
Three and you're into jazz.

 
Posted : 20/11/2007 6:05 pm
CitiZenNoir
(@citizennoir)
Posts: 1247
Noble Member
 

Hey :D
Nice job El 8)

And it seems that you've achieved the 'tension' you were probably looking for with that riff! :twisted:

Perhaps listeners would understand better if they were dancing in the streets with the aliens! :wink:

I thought it sounded 'surfy'....
(Surfing with the aliens????)

Anyway...
Looking forward to more,

Ken

"The man who has begun to live more seriously within
begins to live more simply without"
-Ernest Hemingway

"A genuine individual is an outright nuisance in a factory"
-Orson Welles

 
Posted : 20/11/2007 6:56 pm
Dan T.
(@dan-t)
Posts: 5044
Illustrious Member
 

Very nice elpantalla! 8)

Keep working on those originals! :D

Dan

"The only way I know that guarantees no mistakes is not to play and that's simply not an option". David Hodge

 
Posted : 21/11/2007 9:55 am
Isabelle
(@isabelle)
Posts: 244
Reputable Member
 

Great job your stuff is some of the best on here I think.

+1

I'm another one that would buy your stuff. I'd love an elpantalla CD to listen to in my car :)

 
Posted : 21/11/2007 1:24 pm
elpantalla
(@elpantalla)
Posts: 271
Honorable Member
Topic starter
 

Wow, thanks guys. I was not aware that I was actually known at all here.

One chord is fine.
Two you're pushing it.
Three and you're into jazz.

 
Posted : 21/11/2007 7:51 pm
smokindog
(@smokindog)
Posts: 5345
Illustrious Member
 

Nice tune! I liked that riff, its a bit odd but thats why it fits. Hmmmm...I wonder what some 60's style electric organ might sound like in the mix? Think B-52's.

My Youtube Page
http://www.youtube.com/user/smokindog
http://www.soundclick.com/smokindogandthebluezers

http://www.soundclick.com/guitarforumjams

 
Posted : 24/11/2007 3:26 am