The lights are always on
even when all are gone
at the special m motel
the lights are always on
two barren children come elope
to just maybe find some hope
at the special m motel
the lights are always on
Chorus:
Look into their eyes
are they decaying inside
look past the dead flies
was their love denied
Hold my hand i'll hold yours
will you be caught by my lures
at the special m motel
the lights are always on
an old couple stumbles past
hoping maybe their marriage will last
at the special m motel
where the lights are always on
Chorus:
Look into their eyes
are they decaying inside
look past the dead flies
was their love denied
Lovers come and go
watch the ebb and flow
at the special m motel
where the lights are always on
the lights are always on
well, you already know i like it :)
Hi'a Ruepickle
Nice simple story line, and , very clever rhymn and good beat going here.
Can't comment from the pop angle, as it is not my speciality.
Go well
Ja'mir
I am a cloud within a cloud http://www.justjamir.com
you can hear my songs at :
lol, i don't think pop is any of our specialties! lol!
Yeah, I liked it too, good rhyme, imagery, & rhythm.
Hey Rue,
Really good. As others already said, it flows well, the meter is good, has good imagery. I especially like the last verse, the "ebb & flow" captures the notion of waves of people coming and going. Very nice. And you are rhyming very well these days.
-- Scratch
*bows* i've been working on that whole silly rhyming thing. . . ;D