Really couldn't take this one seriously. Sorry.
Title: You for Christmas
Bought myself the perfect present
wrapped it and put it by the tree.
Wrote nice things on a gift tag on it,
sent with love from you to me.
How I wish you were there to share it
but you ran away cos you just didn't care, it
won't be the same but I'm
eating you for Christmas.
It's a time for caring, giving, sharing
a time to be with your family.
Chestnuts roasting by the fireside,
ghostly tales and songs of peace.
But you ran off with your brand new lover so I
sauteed you both with the pan half-covered.
It tastes like chicken, when I'm
eating you for Christmas, yes I am
I'm eating you for Christmas, doo de doo de doo de doo, ho ho ho.
"Be good at what you can do" - Fingerbanger"
I have always felt that it is better to do what is beautiful than what is 'right'" - Eliot Fisk
Wedding music and guitar lessons in Essex. Listen at: http://www.rollmopmusic.co.uk
Yikes! :shock: Very Hannibal Lecter...Sweeney Todd....Eating Raoul...ish...but, I guess everyone needs a song they can call their own and hum during their contemplative moments in life....even cannibals. :roll:
Suggestion
Maybe the "eating you for Christmas." could be suspended by saying, "I'll be having you for Christmas dinner"...or "Whom shall I have this Christmas dinner?"
or
...the wife mentions "We'll be having Mr. X (the adulterer) for Christmas dinner....have you confirmed Mr. X for Christmas dinner?....It's a shame/odd Mr. X didn't call about not making Christmas dinner...." Husband, "Oh but he WAS Christmas dinner....and you're dessert" HORROR Scream Fade to black etc...
Twisted, Mr. Green. Very twisted, :D
-James
I definitely do NOT want to be on your Christmas list.
Gives a whole new meaning to "your cheatin' heart".
Maybe . . . your cheatin', stir fried heart?
Bravo, Alan
But I honestly think you missed the whole point of the Goodwill to Men/Peace on Earth/Tidings of Great Joy/Christmas Spirit concept.
Now, if you would add some more verses with the gory specifics, please . . .
It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.
Tidings of joy etc. Sort of like
So as I unwrap my big present
Bring me tidings of comfort and joy
I can't wait to serve the dinner
my carving knife is my favourite toy
I'll cut you into tender slices
with double helpings of melons and ices
You'd look so good with a salad that I'm
eating you for Christmas
Am I getting it right yet?
"Be good at what you can do" - Fingerbanger"
I have always felt that it is better to do what is beautiful than what is 'right'" - Eliot Fisk
Wedding music and guitar lessons in Essex. Listen at: http://www.rollmopmusic.co.uk
Oh yeh!
You're on a roll.
Jeffrey Dahmer would be so proud.
It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.
Here.
In the (not so true) spirit of Christmas giving . . .
I'll hang you in Christmas stockings
Kept warm by the chimney place fire
And deck the halls by stringing
your bowels wrapped in barbed wire.
While dreams of your sugared thumbs
Dance across my merry mind,
I enjoy holiday cheer by serving
A platter of garlic roasted mankind.
KR2 Oops . . . almost forgot. Merry Christmas
It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.
Geez... :shock: :mrgreen:
I'm never going to be able to tell kids to "eat up your Greens".... now without shuddering.
I did like Ken's suggestion anout "your cheatin' stir fried heart though". :note1: :note2:
Great song for 21st century Carol singers to go doorknocking with. :wink:
Cheers,
Chris
Really couldn't take this one seriously. Sorry.
And that's a bad thing?
It's.....it's Hannibal Lecter's Xmas gift to the poor. It's....not quite developed to its full potential, but there's some good suggestions there form the other sickos on this forum.
Did I really say "other sickos?" I actually meant morbid buggers.....
Seriously, there's a lot of potential there for a fun - as in "black humour" - song - you just need to carry the story line a little further, IMO. What happens next?
:D :D :D
Vic
"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)
What happens next?
Cold, in sandwiches on Boxing Day - what else?
LOL
A :-)
"Be good at what you can do" - Fingerbanger"
I have always felt that it is better to do what is beautiful than what is 'right'" - Eliot Fisk
Wedding music and guitar lessons in Essex. Listen at: http://www.rollmopmusic.co.uk
Cold, in sandwiches on Boxing Day - what else?
:mrgreen:
And I bet it would be leg meat. The breast always gets eaten up first on Christmas day...
There'd be a fair bit of tucker on those drumsticks too....
You do know we are all documenting our depravity, don't you.
But foremost on my mind and of the utmost concern is . . . what will the bots think?
KR2
It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.
But foremost on my mind and of the utmost concern is . . . what will the bots think?
On this family occasion, and with the spirit of Crimbo in mind, just let me say I don't %$^$%^%$""$ care what the Bots think
Hee hee
A :-)
"Be good at what you can do" - Fingerbanger"
I have always felt that it is better to do what is beautiful than what is 'right'" - Eliot Fisk
Wedding music and guitar lessons in Essex. Listen at: http://www.rollmopmusic.co.uk
I'm thinking that I'll take a pass at dinner at your place over the holidays, Alan. This certainly is chilling and funny but it begs the question - do you serve red or white wine with an ex?
Peace
