SSG Y12W6 Before There's an After

James, thanks for making me feel old. I don't know what the song is about and I don't like the music. :? And get off my lawn!

Seriously, I can't comment on the music because it's a style that doesn't appeal to me.

As far as the lyrics, there seem to be some contradictions or maybe just some lines that could be clearer. The first verse is about old clothes. In other verses there are new shoes and a new hat.

Instead of this:
I’m popping old buttons; bursting at the seams
These hand-me-down clothes can’t hold my dreams

How about this:
I've been popping old buttons; bursting at the seams
Those hand-me-down clothes couldn't hold my dreams

The line "Lookin’ like forever 21" makes me think of someone who is older trying to look young, while "When you come of age you’re a loaded gun" makes me think of someone who has just turned 21.

I'm not clear on what the "after" is. After the dance? After the singer spends the night with somebody that she picks up?

What does Obamacare have to do with the rest of the song?

James, thanks for making me feel old. I don't know what the song is about and I don't like the music. And get off my lawn!
:lol: :lol: :lol: Great rant!

Well I guess the mission was accomplished....somewhat. The target audience was for late teens/early 20s to be sung by an R&B diva type but generic enough to cross genres.......
Seriously, I can't comment on the music because it's a style that doesn't appeal to me.

I was going for a modern R&B swing type feel. :note2:
How about this:
I've been popping old buttons; bursting at the seams
Those hand-me-down clothes couldn't hold my dreams

Better, thanks.
The line "Lookin’ like forever 21" makes me think of someone who is older trying to look young, while "When you come of age you’re a loaded gun" makes me think of someone who has just turned 21.

Changed I'm not clear on what the "after" is. After the dance? After the singer spends the night with somebody that she picks up?

The after is after whatever is BIG in someone's life....dance, relationship, fame, etc...whatever life events people start reliving in their minds......it's a coming of age song with the metaphor of getting new clothes is a new stage in life.
What does Obamacare have to do with the rest of the song?

Probably not enough....I was trying to show that while "adults" are debating and concerned over current hot topics like health care, young adults probably think very little about such concerns....the most serious health issue could be "morning hair" for the young and healthy.

Thanks for the listen and feedback; especially when it wasn't an enjoyable experience for you. :roll: :wink:

James

You didn't change the posted lyrics here or on Soundclick. I think that the revised lyrics in your recording flow better. Also, I find the revised recording more musical. Not sure what you changed. I think the original recording had some sort of background vocals that to me didn't fit the rest of the music.

Thanks, Renee. I got the revised lyrics up now :wink:

Hi James,
Admittedly I don't know much about current pop music either, the only time I hear it is when I'm in stores or getting my haircut, melodyne and predictable rhymes :lol:. I'm wondering about the tempo, especially in the rap section. I'm reminded a bit of the 80's Blondie song "Rapture" (now its an oldie) where the catchy rap verses are spoken much faster than the chorus is sung

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHCdS7O248g

Andy

Hi Andy,
I'm reminded a bit of the 80's Blondie song "Rapture" (now its an oldie)

Ah, yes. Good reference :)

Thanks for the listen and post!

James