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SSG3 - Week 1 - Ol' Hickory

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(@scratchmonkey)
Honorable Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 603
Topic starter  

SSG3 - Week 1 - Ol' Hickory

[v1]
Back when I was Robin Hood,
we took on Little John.
We crossed the Mississippi,
on old MacGregor's pond.
You helped me slay dragons,
and rescue damsels fair.
no matter what the challenge was,
you were always there.

[chorus]
Just a worn out hickory pole,
since nineteen sixty-two.
From an appalachian hillside,
just above the slough.
Leanin' in the corner,
folks don't know why I keep you.
They couldn't know the fun we've had,
the adventures we've been through.

[v2]
When I ran away from home,
it was you that held the pack.
Same day before the sun went down,
your shadow led me back.
You went with me to Yasgur's farm,
kept the tent from going slack.
And travelled with me up and down
many miles of railroad track.

[v3]
T'was you that sent old Jones' dogs,
back home where they belonged.
I'd never made the mountain top,
without you to lean on.
My bones are old and brittle now,
but you're still straight and strong.
You'll make memories with someone new,
when I'm long dead and gone.

[chorus]
Just a worn out hickory pole,
since nineteen sixty-two.
From an appalachian hillside,
just above the slough.
Leanin' in the corner,
folks don't know why I keep you.
They couldn't know the fun we've had,
the adventures we've been through.

-- Scratch 8)

-- Scratch 8)


"...if heartaches were commercials, we'd all be on TV" -- John Prine
42


   
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(@cheapthrill)
Estimable Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 224
 

hey scratch,

what a way to start out the new year. good to see you back on track totally. you managed to follow the topic to a tee. *pat on back* :D

i like how you chose a totally different kind of object. not something most of us would have in the room. i like the rhythm of the song and the over all flow. it is nice that you went back to when the guy was a little kid and went up through life. you treated the walking stick like it was an old friend and not just an object. but it was still clear what the object is.

it is good to read a song with pure happy sentiment in it. the opening two lines are just great, wonderful imagery.

keep up the good work.

-CheapThrill


   
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(@smokindog)
Illustrious Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 5345
 

I liked it :!: Its cool how you took somthing like a hickory pole and made a song from it, it takes me back to my childhood :) -the dog

My Youtube Page
http://www.youtube.com/user/smokindog
http://www.soundclick.com/smokindogandthebluezers

http://www.soundclick.com/guitarforumjams


   
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(@sarah)
Eminent Member
Joined: 21 years ago
Posts: 26
 

Very well done! I love the imagery and the sentiment.

Two thoughts:

1) Robin Hood and Little John were friends, so I'm not sure if you meant "taking on Little John" in a sparring/practice/goofing around kind of way or if you meant "taking on" as in fighting.

2) Also, perhaps change the structure to "V V C V C". A "V C V V C" structure, as you have it now, is a bit unconventional, which isn't bad, of course, just something to consider in the way the song will sound when played.


   
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(@thejackal)
Estimable Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 79
 

Remember Sarah that Little John would not let Robin Hood cross the river in the beginning. They had a fight before they were friends.

Scratch -- This one is amazing man. I would not change a thing. Absolutely top notch. Got nothing else to add.

TheJackal.

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/pagemusic.cfm?bandID=283413

Only dead fish go with the flow.


   
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(@scratchmonkey)
Honorable Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 603
Topic starter  

Sarah,

Like theJackal said, I was referring to their initial meeting, where they sparred on the bridge with quarter-staves. (staffs?)
As to your second point, You're probably right. I'm going to have to shuffle those around a bit. But I like your suggestion of VVCVC. Just thought I'd try something slightly different, but your way flows more easily.
CheapThrill & Dog,... Thanks!

-- Scratch 8)

-- Scratch 8)


"...if heartaches were commercials, we'd all be on TV" -- John Prine
42


   
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 Celt
(@celt)
Famed Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 2649
 

Scratch,

Excellent, You managed to catch the sentiment without going over the top. I like the way you bring Ol' Hickory with you from childhood throught you Yasgur Farm days and on to someplace more mature.

Great start to a new year.

Celt

My SoundClick Page

Collaborations

" It's easier than waiting around to die" Townes Van Zandt


   
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 Rob
(@rob)
Trusted Member
Joined: 22 years ago
Posts: 53
 

hi scratch

excellent stuff, i like the 'reminising with a hint of humour' tone

not so sure how well railroad tracks fit in with robin hood, dragons damsels, farms etc but i guess the whole song is about time and timelessness, so it works ok.

rob


   
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(@jamir)
Honorable Member
Joined: 21 years ago
Posts: 434
 

Hey'a Genius........ I'm gonna have to work very hard this year to get up to "Scratch" so to speak.
I am not even going to complain about the length of the song after listening to Bob Dylan and Leonard Cohen for the last few weeks. Yours is short in comparison
Excellent song,nothing I can say to make it better than it it, but, the question is.... am I ever goin to hear this masterpiece.

Go well my friend
Ja'mir

I am a cloud within a cloud http://www.justjamir.com

you can hear my songs at :

http://www.mp3.com.au/artist.asp?id=21709


   
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(@scratchmonkey)
Honorable Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 603
Topic starter  

I am not even going to complain about the length of the song after listening to Bob Dylan and Leonard Cohen for the last few weeks. Yours is short in comparison That's what I've been tellin' ya! :D
the question is.... am I ever goin to hear this masterpiece. I dunno that I'd call it a masterpiece,... but we'll see. I've gotten a bit better over the last year. Kinda depends on whether or not I can come up with a tune that doesn't sound exaclty like every other tune I've ever managed to put together. Thanks for the kind words.

-- Scratch 8)

-- Scratch 8)


"...if heartaches were commercials, we'd all be on TV" -- John Prine
42


   
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(@sunsetncnja)
Trusted Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 40
 

Great stuff as usual. Don't know what to say that hasn't already been said. You've got this gift for coming up with original takes on things that are at the same time familiar to almost everyone. I know when I was a kid, I'd pick up a stick and all of a sudden it was a sword, or a staff, or something. People kind of lose that kind of imagination when they get older.


   
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