Typical {week 15 }

I'll screw that list for you

I love this line. The mood of the whole song really interests me due to late events in my relationship. so ye, I can see where you're going. sorry to hear about your hand too. it'll pass soon.

good work ;)

Thanks for the feed back

And welcome to SSG ..I have not seen you around before

Trevor

Trev,

I think the first half is good, I just feel that you ran out of steam in second half (game of two halves mate). I do like the positive / negative structure of the halves, stick with it, you could do something with this.

Ps I'm just quietly freaking out at the moment and not writing cos I've got a live performance to do next week, I sometimes wonder why I keep putting myself through this.

Cheers
Paul

Paul you mentioned its' like a game of 2 halves ..

Thats what I was aiming for ...

Meat loafs Dashboard lights ...1st verse he is all over this gorl and the second verse he praying for the end of time ...

I wanted to try and do my own little take on that style ...

Trevor

Ps

Paul ,

I'm sure you will be great mate ..

"Meat loafs Dashboard lights ...1st verse he is all over this gorl and the second verse he praying for the end of time ... I wanted to try and do my own little take on that style ..."

I think you achieved that.....I thought it was going to be a lovey-dovey Valentine's song at first, you dragged me in then hit me with a sucker punch - really like the way you turned it all around!

Also reminds me of John Fogerty's "Honey Do" off the "Deja Vu All Over Again" album in style - and hey, being compared with JF has got to be a good thing!!!

The one verse I thought was a little clumsy was this one....

"Thats' not alright lady
Don't ever call me baby
Nothing on this Earth
Can make me fell like dirt"

maybe....

"It's far from alright, lady,
I don't want to be your baby,
You just turned my happiness,
To a broken-hearted mess"

(I got kind of a country feeling from the song.....)

as always, just MY opinion - but for what it's worth, you're getting better.....hope the same goes for the hand.....

(last year, after my second accident, the doctor wanted to replace my plaster with a lighter one after a month - when I went back to the hospital, I refused a second plaster - I was DESPERATE to play guitar again.....figured until I got my fingers moving properly, at least without a plaster I could play with a slide..... with hindsight, maybe I was stupid, but then again I was right for once in my life - physiotherapy (playing chords!) got me using the hand a lot quicker than the doctor said I would.....I was playing again after two months, he said it'd take six.....there is nothing stronger than the human spirit, especially when combined with the determination to prove someone wrong....and a bit of sheer bloody-minded pig-headedness can be a good thing too!!!! )

:D :D :D

Vic

Thanks for formative feed back Vic ..

Country flavour ..Yes I can see that I have been listening alot Kirsty McColls " Days " for some reason ..

Its' a very lovely song and maybe that sort of theme has followed me as I wrote this ...

John Fogerty ...WOW big compliment and gracefully accepted thank you ..

The verse you mentioned was were I was stuck for ages and I guess that shows .. Thanks for offering of a re-write ...

I haven't even picked my guitar up since getting this second plaster on ..

as always, just MY opinion - but for what it's worth, you're getting better.....hope the same goes for the hand.....

Thank you ...I think it is getting better as I don't have to have so many beers when I come home now from work ... :lol:

Ever tried to put a belt on your pants with one hand ?

Little things I am finding almost impossible ...

But my lad knows how to open a beer for his old man as the new plaster I can't even hold a can ...grrr

first thing I learned to do with a hand in plaster was open a can with one hand .......

Teleplayer even suggested playing with a slide on my toe......

:D :D :D

Vic