Stazlie
open (capo 2)
F#m(Em) D(C)
Stazlie wakes up early every morning
A(G) E(D)
Tries to wipe the sleep out of her eyes
F#m(Em) D(C)
Stumbles out of bed toward the window
A(G) E(D)
And stares out at the darkened, rainy skies.
----
Chorus
A(G) D(C)
1.2.(But) 3. Stazlie dreams of living in Montana
G(F) D(C) A(G)
Breathing in the cold mountain air
A(G) D(C)
Or maybe on a beach in Aruba
G(F) D(C) A(G)
With ocean breezes blowing through her hair
---
F#m(Em) D(C)
Stazlie checks the new lines on her forehead
A(G) E(D)
With the grey hairs sitting softly up above
F#m(Em) D(C)
How'd she ever find herself so lonely?
A(G) E(D)
Married to a job she doesn't love?
(Chorus)
F#m(Em) D(C)
Stazlie knows there's people counting on her.
A(G) E(D)
Her briefcase stares back at her from the floor.
F#m(Em) D(C)
Stazlie finally knows what she must do now.
A(G) E(D)
Grabs her coat while heading out the door.
(Chorus)
John A.
They say only a pawnshop guitar can play the blues. An eBay one does it better. A guitar's bound to feel unloved if her owner plasters pictures of her over the internet for all to see and then sells her off to the highest anonymous bidder.
Hi Dustdevil,
I liked this alot, can't put my finger on anything :)
When reading, I imagined it sounding like a Counting Crows song or similar. Do you have any music in mind to go with it? Any chance of recording?
Good stuff!
:)
-man
"I wish there was an over the counter test for my loneliness"
There's a lot to like here. You do a great job of giving enough detail that lets the listener (or reader) fill in the blanks to get a complete picture of Stazlie's life. Well done.
Only comment would be that it's short and I'd love more. That doesn't mean it should be longer, though. Leaving them wanting more is important.
Can't wait to read your next one!
Peace
I quite liked this too. Evokes a sense of real pity (probably not the best word) for Stazlie.
The song also leaves me wanting to know what happens next? It does well to establish a connection with the character. And like David said, it does well with not too much detail, allowing the listener to "fill in the blanks".
Stazlie knows there's people counting on her.
Her briefcase stares back at her from the floor.
Stazlie finally knows what she must do now.
'Grabs her coat while heading out the door.
I really like this last verse. And maybe I'm completely off the mark in my interpretation here, but what I think of when I read this is: "So what is she going to do?". Of course, I then read the last line and think that the "coat" is a reference to the cold of Montana, so she's leaving behind the briefcase but taking the coat and fulfilling her dreams.
Okay, either this is way off the mark or blatantly obvious. Either way, don't hesitate to tell me so. :oops: :D
Great work. 8)
From little things big things grow - Paul Kelly
hI
Yeah I also like this and do agree with others about the length ..
There is just so much in here that I can relate to .. such as married to a job she doen't love ..
And when I read this ,Stazlie checks the new lines on her forehead
I quickly ran my hand across my forehead :lol:
Like already mentioned I would like more I was just really feeling for her and it ended .
What you have is really good
Keep up the writting
Hilch :?:
Here is to you as good as you are
And here is to me as bad as I am
As good as you are and as bad as I am
I'm as good as you are as bad as I am
I quite liked this too. Evokes a sense of real pity (probably not the best word) for Stazlie.
The song also leaves me wanting to know what happens next? It does well to establish a connection with the character. And like David said, it does well with not too much detail, allowing the listener to "fill in the blanks".
Stazlie knows there's people counting on her.
Her briefcase stares back at her from the floor.
Stazlie finally knows what she must do now.
'Grabs her coat while heading out the door.
I really like this last verse. And maybe I'm completely off the mark in my interpretation here, but what I think of when I read this is: "So what is she going to do?". Of course, I then read the last line and think that the "coat" is a reference to the cold of Montana, so she's leaving behind the briefcase but taking the coat and fulfilling her dreams.
Okay, either this is way off the mark or blatantly obvious. Either way, don't hesitate to tell me so. :oops: :D
Great work. 8)
Thanks for all the comments, guys. You don't know how helpful this is to me. A couple of things to say...
1. I cheated somewhat. I started this a couple of weeks ago. There is no way I could write a song completely in a week. Writing to me, at this point is like solving a Rubik's Cube. Twisting and turning words and phrases in and out until my head hurts. I have great respect for those of you for whom the words flow out easily and in meter. I just thought this song fit the theme well, so points off for that.
2. I wanted to write the world's only song in F#m. What I got was either F#m, A, or G. I'm not sure. I'll try to re-edit with chords on the original post. You can play it in F#m, or in Em (capo 2) or even higher in Am, or of course however you want.... :)
3. Bennett, you nailed it! I purposely left the ending ambiguous because I was curious to see how different people would interpret it. So it's a story, it's a riddle. The "coat" could be for Montana or it could be a raincoat for the "darkened, rainy skies". Either interpretation works. I can see 3 possible endings to the song...
a. Stazlie "comes to her senses" and goes to work.
b. Stazlie "comes to her senses" and leaves to persue her dreams.
c. Stazlie goes to work and the whole process starts over the next day.
I think what you can feel for Stazlie is pity but also empathy. It's really a song about getting up in the morning, looking in the mirror and making a choice. Some days are easier than others. I guess the day you finally "cash out" is the day you retire. (BTW, I don't really know if women think this way. I didn't think anyone would feel sorry for "Stanley") I'd like to think Stazlie eventually ends up on a beach somewhere with a Pina Colada, but make up your own ending. I'm out of words...
When I played this for friends and family, I got a whole lot of "neutral". I think the lack of length has a lot to do with that. Ironically, my pointless meandering above is many times longer than the song itself. I'm still overthinking things. Any suggestions as to how to improve the length or melody would be greatly appreciated. I'll try to get the chords in tonight.
Thanks to all for taking the time to read it and comment.
John A.
They say only a pawnshop guitar can play the blues. An eBay one does it better. A guitar's bound to feel unloved if her owner plasters pictures of her over the internet for all to see and then sells her off to the highest anonymous bidder.
Chords are up. The first set is what it was originally written in. The ones in () are what you play with a capo on the 2nd fret in case you don't want to mess with the whole F#m thing.
John A.
They say only a pawnshop guitar can play the blues. An eBay one does it better. A guitar's bound to feel unloved if her owner plasters pictures of her over the internet for all to see and then sells her off to the highest anonymous bidder.
Hello
Well very descipitive , and I think the chords would suit this remarkably well
Keep posting
L.K
Aghhhh
Not only am I a senior citizen
I'm now a bloody senior member
Are you people trying to tell me I'm old or what ?
over 700 posts ( I really do need to get out more )
Hi Dustdevil
Nice and easy to play and get a feel for what you were trying for here. Nice chord sequence for the chorus.
Really makes you feel for Stazlie- you're instantly on her side.
Good stuff
Bob :wink:
You are what you eat, eat well
