Though I wanted to join this group to write some original songs, I can't resist the urge to do an adaptation. Fortunately, I'm quite pleased with the result so far. I still promised to record my previous song, and this one will be a lot harder than that one! Someday...
To the tune of Oh Well, Okay.
Got a CD I just don’t see it any more
It was Elliot Smith’s XO that I had of yore
But I guess you took it and I will not blame you
Me a tourist for your pitch black mood
A shrink pretend to save the day
Oh well, okay
Hollywood had taught me love, me I had no clue
Never let them come to near, except now for you
I needed your love but I took your body
In the comfort of your Mary Jane
Self medicate the pain away
Oh well, okay
In the morning panic strikes as you realize
Night spent with another guy; try to stop your cries
Playing you your songs doesn’t work together
Recognition for your pitch black mood
But you’re not feeling all that gay
Oh well, okay
Should you ever see me and still feel guilty
Tell me you have it and it’s okay
Cause boy I know it’s hard to say
Oh well, okay
Oh well, okay
Oh well, okay
Hi Sunnydunes,
I like it :D . My take here that this is about a gay one night stand, if so I think that I would expand on this theme a bit. Why this is different from any other one night stand. The other thing that jumps out at me is the pain allusion, I need to know more, it just kind of jumped out unexpectedly. Maybe it's because our subject is in conflict with his own sexuality, doubts and societal pressure, I dont know. For me all of these are great fodder for a song.
I think using someone else song as a source and starting point is a very valid technique which I have used myself on a few occasions, the tough part is when / if you finally put your own music to it, sometimes the lyrics need to be rewritten and can loose their edge.
Cheers
Paul
For some reason I missed this one till now....I don't know the original song at all, so I'm going to have to look it up and compare it with your lyrics before I'm able to comment. I'll do that in the AM....'tis almost 1am here, and I'm actually tired...must be getting old!
:D :D :D
Vic
"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)
Thanks for the comments Paul!
Maybe I tried to cram too much into one song. In addition to the gay one night stand I tried to talk about depression and how it comes in between people. With Elliott Smith as the depression poster child, ‘you’ with a pitch black mood, ‘I’ unable to reach him despite recognizing depressed feelings. And closer to this week’s theme, about how you can feel a song belongs to you and you alone. Hence ‘you’ stealing the CD, and then me making new lyrics to an Elliott Smith song in order to make it my own again.
Lots of explanation necessary... I tried to show not tell, but maybe it becomes more clear if I work the actual word depression into the lyrics somewhere.
I'd love to hear your thoughts Vic!
Looking like a good start.
The lyrics are intriguing. I don't have a handle on what is going on, but that's not a bad thing. I like the music a lot, but I'm sure you'll want to distance your own song in some way.
I have found this kind of lyric difficult to complete because one keeps running the other person's melody through it.....maybe try a switch of genre to add new music or change the time from 4/4 to 3/4 etc.
James
