Close
Skip to content

Forum

Y12 W9 Here Comes T...
 
Notifications
Clear all

Y12 W9 Here Comes The Royal Whatever


(@andygetch)
Reputable Member
Joined: 10 years ago
Posts: 328
Topic starter  

After frustration and struggles with the last two assignments this "whatever" list song popped out quickly, or maybe it is just more piling on

http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=12623441

Repeated progression
Em Em/B Bm Bm/F# C C/G

Verse 1
Em
King's mansion documentaries
Em/B
politician speeches and postures
Bm
sex and celebrities
Bm/F#
reality TV
C
Black Friday
C/G
Cyber Monday

Repeat Intro

Verse 2
Em
a society of animal products
Em/B
chemical food concoctions
Bm
cars cutting us off
Bm/F#
here comes the price of
C
your opinions
C/G
your choices
Em Em/B
to complain about bosses, kids, parents
Bm Bm/F#
the weather
C C/G
A wasted life of denial, anger and regrets
Em Em/B
Whatever

Repeat Intro

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default.cfm?bandID=1228093


Quote
 pbee
(@pbee)
Noble Member
Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 2097
 

Hi Andy,
I think this is great :D reminds me of Cohen. If this was my song I would do 2 things with it, 1) I would repeat the "whatever" at the end after the last "repeat intro". Very powerful as you have it but maybe the repeat will give it more. 2) I would somehow, without being too explicit connect the verses to the "human condition" using words like "We talk of..." or "We live in .. " that kind of stuff. I guess what I'm trying to say here is that I would try to make the list not sound like a list, if that makes sense.

Good stuff though well done

cheers

Paul


Check out my Reverbnation page here


ReplyQuote
(@andygetch)
Reputable Member
Joined: 10 years ago
Posts: 328
Topic starter  

I think this is great :D reminds me of Cohen
I am humbled and honored. Leonard is one of my songwriting heroes and I was lucky enough to see him perform earlier this year in Tampa.
If this was my song I would do 2 things with it, 1) I would repeat the "whatever" at the end after the last "repeat intro". Very powerful as you have it but maybe the repeat will give it more. 2) I would somehow, without being too explicit connect the verses to the "human condition" using words like "We talk of..." or "We live in .. " that kind of stuff. I guess what I'm trying to say here is that I would try to make the list not sound like a list, if that makes sense.
Yes, as it was a quick write, there is still room and time for editing/rewrite/rerecording and I do an alternate version with the suggestions. Overnight my internal critic was declaring it to not be a story or songlike. Of course my internal critic only criticizes and does not make suggestions for improvement. Thanks Paul!

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default.cfm?bandID=1228093


ReplyQuote
(@davidhodge)
Member Moderator
Joined: 14 years ago
Posts: 4485
 

Hi Andy

Interesting way to use the title to accommodate several assignments! Personally, I think just "Whatever" would have done nicely.

Not sure everything fits together as well as it might. The second verse starts out with "a society of animal products" and "chemical food concoctions," but then goes on to "cars cutting us off," which seems a concern of a much a smaller scale than the others, not to mention it doesn't tie in as well with the rest of the verse.

Speaking of which, the pause between "here comes the cost of" and "your opinions" and "your choices" is a bit disruptive to the flow of thought. That may simply be the reading at the time of the recording, though.

Like the incredible discordant use of the synth. A lot.

As always, I look forward to more.

Peace


ReplyQuote
(@john-sargent)
Prominent Member
Joined: 12 years ago
Posts: 948
 

I liked that it was a spoken piece. I read lyrics before I listen to the songs here and was trying to envision how it would be spoken.
I think the first line is weak. The King reference is, of course, from last weeks assignment.


ReplyQuote
(@jamestoffee)
Famed Member
Joined: 13 years ago
Posts: 2852
 

Hi Andy,

Experimental, the clash of chords between the keyboard pad and guitar arpeggio won't let me settle into the song, but it seems like the lyrics are not meant to have a "feel good" message anyway.....so chalk one up for prosody :D

Thanks for sharing.

James


ReplyQuote
(@barnabus-rox)
Famed Member
Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 2976
 

Hi Andy

What a cool concept , finger picking an talking , My kind of music :)
Loved this line ..
a society of animal products

Great piece ..

Trev.. :D :D

Here is to you as good as you are
And here is to me as bad as I am
As good as you are and as bad as I am
I'm as good as you are as bad as I am


ReplyQuote