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Y12W19 "Marie from the Desert"

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(@wilcoman)
Eminent Member
Joined: 10 years ago
Posts: 23
Topic starter  

Marie from the Desert

I think I would want to play this in the vein of a John Prine song...

V: Life on the streets was nothing new for her
Her mama left her in a bed of roses
Her first memory was of the earth
The taste of dirt and sound of leaves blowing

Her teen years she drifted like a butterfly wing
That was separated from its source
The light always shined down on other things
She always wanted something more

C: Marie from the desert spent her later years in the rain
Trying to drowned her past like finding a new name
She sang songs to herself while sleeping on a grate
Dreaming of her nomad desert days

V:She tried and tried to climb that hill once more
She had enough of the snow, hail, and rain
There was always another and another closed door
The wind of her past was catching up again

Yet still she climbed and climbed always focused on the end
Until she saw there wasn’t a top to the hill
The road that she was on had many many bends
She learned to embrace it all and watch her cup fill

C:Marie from the desert spent her later years in the rain
Trying to drowned her past like finding a new name
She sang songs to herself while sleeping on a grate
Dreaming of her nomad desert days

You may see her sitting sittin on the corner of your street
Smiling eyes and soaked to the bone
Wondering how anyone can smile with no heat
And nothing but a box to call her home

C:


   
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(@jamestoffee)
Famed Member
Joined: 15 years ago
Posts: 2855
 

Hi wilcoman,

Nice start :D I like the poetic images in v1 and 2 and the way the last verse is stated.

Suggestion: Consider clarifying v3 & 4. It seems like it's trying to say too much and gets confusing with a hill climb, desire for a change of weather, winds of past, bends, cups filling

Thanks for sharing.

James


   
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