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Y4week2 things are reverse

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(@straycat)
Noble Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 1282
Topic starter  

hello... :wink: you can find the photograph here:

Things are reverse.

Things are reverse
There's snow in the sky
And I'm half awake
On a destructive tide

Things are reverse
Thoughts pass me by
And I'm half-way thru
This incubation time

Then a voice on the phone hailing:
“It is breaking, it's breaking……up”
So what
Perhaps the ice is breaking up
Perhaps drunken beams alight the rocks
And paint pictures on the ocean, calm and quiet
Well, I can't share your excitement when
Over here there's still snow in the sky

Here things are reverse
You might've gone blind
But I'm half dead
With all this snow in the sky
And spring still lying in wait
I'd like a descent escape

hope someone likes it :D
cheers,
bluenightangel

p.s. ah...yes...the first two verses sound good with the melody of bright eyes' "messenger bird"(the part where it goes like "you sent me away...") :wink:

"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin


   
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(@teleplayer324)
Noble Member
Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 1506
 

I liked it, very descriptive imagery, especially your description of the ocean.
Bright eyes huh? I was imagining a Hendrix type vibe as I was reading it

Immature? Of course I'm immature Einstein, I'm 50 and in a Rock and ROll band.

New Band site http://www.myspace.com/guidedbymonkeys


   
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 geoo
(@geoo)
Famed Member
Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 2801
 

Hey I like it too. I was going to do what you did and post a link to the pic so people could see where I got my inspiration from. But you beat me to it.. LOL

Keep up the beautiful work.

Geoo

“The hardest thing in life is to know which bridge to cross and which to burn” - David Russell (Scottish classical Guitarist. b.1942)


   
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 Celt
(@celt)
Famed Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 2649
 

Bluenightangel,

Great photo

I like the song too. This seems a little different for you.

Well at least until the Bridge then you get into your style
at its best.

Very Good

John

My SoundClick Page

Collaborations

" It's easier than waiting around to die" Townes Van Zandt


   
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(@lotto-king)
Prominent Member
Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 777
 

Congrats Angel

this is a lovely song well done your lyrics are very well constructed and the flow is wonderful ..

Well done gurl

L.k

Aghhhh

Not only am I a senior citizen

I'm now a bloody senior member

Are you people trying to tell me I'm old or what ?

over 700 posts ( I really do need to get out more )


   
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(@vic-lewis-vl)
Illustrious Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 10264
 

I like it, it's a lovely descriptive piece....

There's one word I'd change though,

Things are reverse
There's snow in the sky
And I'm half awake
On a destructive tide

Things are reverse
Thoughts pass me by
And I'm half-way thru
This incubation time.....

I'd be very tempted to change "incubation" to "hibernation" - fits perfectly with the imagery I got from the first verse....

Lovely writing....

:D :D :D

Vic

"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)


   
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(@straycat)
Noble Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 1282
Topic starter  

:D so glad you all like it :D

vic, what you say is very interesting... hibernation... would definitely work, too....is a little less threatening/whatever... I think about it, okay? thanks for the suggestion. good idea.

thanks everyone
cheers
bluenightangel

"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin


   
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