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Y5week33 he smiles in that picture

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(@straycat)
Noble Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 1282
Topic starter  

... it's not very openly about father's day, i know... but the idea of imagining someone as a father sometime in the future is there. i promise;-) oh and the quote is from the grand movie "Eternal Sunshine for the Spotless Mind"... just watched it again a few days ago... never gets old.

He smiles in that picture

“I can't remember anything without you“
This is all I have
Selective memory, an abyss fed
But still hungry behind a wall of papier-mâché
A half-hearted postcard from days long past
A dance that never happened
A hand misplaced
And others so tiny
Threefold harmony
This is all I have
One step forward and two back
This is all I have
And it is beautiful
Like songs on random
Painting a portrait
Like a fickle remote control
Casting words to line up in a row
So beautiful
That a mind this slow
Will be content but ignorant
As they're scattered by the hands
Always pushing forward

With your eyes on the clock
You'll never see what you got
If you have a minute
I'll show you all I have
And if you have the patience
I'll show you a picture of two people holding hands in the future.

well, ok.. it's just a draft... still thought i'd post now or never for this week:-)
cheers,
straycat.

"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin


   
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 Bob
(@bob)
Noble Member
Joined: 21 years ago
Posts: 908
 

Hi Straycat

Good idea here and told very well. Lots of very good imagery which fits nicely with the intent you described. The end is really good (fits superbly witha book I'm reading at the moment so kind of hits home anyway :wink: ).

Really like it

Good stuff

Bob :wink:

My Soundclick Page

You are what you eat, eat well


   
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 Olav
(@olav)
Estimable Member
Joined: 21 years ago
Posts: 150
 

StrayCat
Exept from the repeated use ot the word"beautiful"....this is ...quite (may I say)....beautiful
"A half-hearted postcard from days long past
A dance that never happened" .......Now this speaks to the heart..Wow
You got to start recording some of this stuff, I am dying to hear what you do with this
Blessings. Olav


   
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(@straycat)
Noble Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 1282
Topic starter  

wow you did like it:-)

may i ask what book you're reading, bob?
oh olav.. i know.. i really have to record something.. haven't done that in a long time.... you know, finding music is always such a struggle for me. i promise i will give it a go as soon as possible(got 3 presentations and lots of exams coming up now.. but i'll see). the "beautiful" repetition thing.. it was on purpose, but now i'm not so sure anymore;-)

i'm so glad you guys like it.
thank you very much for commenting.
cheers,
anne

"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin


   
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(@vic-lewis-vl)
Illustrious Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 10264
 

I really don't see a problem with "beautiful" - it's only used twice, and adds a little weight, or emphasis. Nicely whimsical song, imagery's spot on as usual. I haven't read or seen Eternal Sunshine, so I can't comment on how it fits there.... but the song itself is good enough not to need any explanations. (I'm one of those people who DOESN'T want to know how the magician does his tricks!)

:D :D :D

Vic

"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)


   
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(@straycat)
Noble Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 1282
Topic starter  

thanks :D

cheers,
straycat.

"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin


   
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