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Y6week8 two hums such as Pooh Would Hum

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(@straycat)
Noble Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 1282
Topic starter  

hey... everyone who has ever read "The House at Pooh Corner" by A. A. Milne may recognize the pattern of Pooh's "Good Hum such as is Hummed Hopefully to Others" and "Noise, by Pooh".. I think they are beautiful and really make you hum along as you read them. If you don't know them, have a read, you won't regret it :D well, mine are not as skillfully done as Pooh's, but here they go:

Noise, by straycat
A hum such as can be hummed At the Fall of Dawn

Oh, the trees are humming
While beneath we're strolling
Through the fields of a spring evening
With bare feet

And the clouds are blurring
While the fireflies are bustling
Around red poppies laughing
In the wind

Oh, the sparrows are telling
Stories of green musings
While ladybirds are falling
Fast asleep

And blue-bells are whisp'ring
Where the wood is dozing
While in the sky a redwing
Makes its home

Oh, the meadow's inviting
Us to spend the night here
And wildcats are curling
Up beside us purring
Goodnight.

A Good Hum such as is Hummed Cheerfully to Oneself

The firefly laughs
As it lands on my nose
As it lands on my nose
I laugh and it goes

And as I go home
I wonder who knows
Fireflies as bold
And laughs as golden.

(for good Pooish humming, insert a "tiddledy pom" between the lines of the verses)

I tried :wink:
happy new year everyone :D
cheers,
straycat.

"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin


   
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(@montezuma)
Estimable Member
Joined: 16 years ago
Posts: 121
 

I am a pooh Fan & I thnk Milne was a genius.
You have done a good job mimicking the Pooh Style.

Your second 'pome' (first verse) is classic - could have been written by him.
Milne as you know however is very strong on rhyme - (one I love, being a perpetually hungry person is:
Im so rumbly
in my tumbly
Time to munch an
early luncheon
)

- so your second verse really needs to rhyme strongly - so that one can hum this really cheerfully :D

A suggestion off the top of my head

I wonder who knows
A firefly as bold
And laughs as gold
And why it chose my nose

(tiddley pom! :D )

Love the first one, although I think you meant dusk - not dawn (?).

Anyway, great Idea nicely executed.
Ola

“Poetry and Hums aren't things which you get, they're things which get you. And all you can do is go where they can find you.” - Winnie the Pooh


   
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(@straycat)
Noble Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 1282
Topic starter  

hey Ola
hope you had a great new year's eve.
great to find another person who is Friendly with Bears :D

you're absolutely right about the second verse of the second hum.. it needs better rhyming. thanks for your suggestion, i'll try to come up with something in that direction.

and, of course, i meant dusk! thanks for pointing it out!! things sometimes get so confusing for a bear of very little brain :wink:

cheers,
straycat.

"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin


   
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(@montezuma)
Estimable Member
Joined: 16 years ago
Posts: 121
 

Hi there fellow pooh fan,

For a bear of little brain your lyrics sure are challenging. Just had a look at your inkwell submission. Ill comment there but just thought Id drop this here.

“Poetry and Hums aren't things which you get, they're things which get you. And all you can do is go where they can find you.”

Lovely, (& very true) Poohism don't you think?

Hmm - I think I might use that as my signature. :)

Ola

“Poetry and Hums aren't things which you get, they're things which get you. And all you can do is go where they can find you.” - Winnie the Pooh


   
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(@straycat)
Noble Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 1282
Topic starter  

yes, that is indeed a very beautiful and true Poohism. once again realized how true when i tried writing something for this week :wink: sometimes you just have to let the ink and paper lie around for a while (and preferably at a place where hums and poetry like to do this gaeity and song-and-dance, here we go 'round the mulberry bush thing. not all can, but some do :wink: ).

very nice signature :D

and by the way.. what do think about these:

And as I stretch my toes
I wonder who knows
Fireflies as bold
And laughs as golden in glow / And laughs as aglow

And as I go home
I wonder who knows
Fireflies as bold
And laughs as golden in tone

I know, it's still quite wobbly. Maybe some better version is yet to cross my mind :D

straycat.

"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin


   
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