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Y7 Week 1 - This Girl (With Video!)

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(@vic-lewis-vl)
Illustrious Member
Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 10340
Topic starter  

OK, what can I say, I cheated - I had prior knowledge of the assignment! At least, I've had the idea for the assignment for a while - the music's G, Em, C and D for the verses, the lyrics - well I did what Nick did last week, found one in the oldies box that started promisingly then fell apart....so I kept the first verse and re-wrote the rest completely. I was hoping to have an MP3 ready, but various factors conspired against me, so I'll have to record it when I get a spare five minutes or so!

EDIT - Wed 5th - One of those factors being Audacity - till such time as I can get a new soundcard, it's hardly worth bothering with. So - I used the digital camera again to record a rough demo. It's here....

http://s13.photobucket.com/albums/a279/viclewis/?action=view&current=MOV00218.flv

For now, think 1950's-style rock'n'roll ballad - something along the lines of "Earth Angel." What, you're too young to remember that song? It's bound to be on youtube somewhere.....

This Girl

(Intro - G, C, C#, D.)

(Sung acapella)This girl is (G)mine, (Em) (C)and to(D)gether we're (G)fine,(Em)
(C)This (D)girl is going to (G)stay, for(Em)ever and a (C)day,
Un(D)til the end of (G)time.(C) (C#) (D)

(Acapella)This girl's so good for (G)me,(Em)(C) took a(D)way my mise(G)ry,(Em)
(C)With(D)out her I'd be (G)blue, I (Em)don't know what I'd (C)do,
If she (D)ever left G)me.(C)(G)

(Bridge)
You might (G7)say she's leading me (C)on,
(Cm)But you couldn't be more (G)wrong,(C) (G)
You might (G7)say she's bad for (C)me,
(Cm)But you don't see her like (G)I see....(C) (C#) (D)

(Instrumental break, following same chord pattern as verses, here.)

(Acapella)This girl's still (G)here,(Em)(C) all(D)ayed all my (G)fears,(Em)
(C)That (D)she's too good for (G)me, or (Em)out of my C)league,
And the (D)future's looking (G)clear.

Not quite sure how to end it yet - probably repeat the last lines a couple of time then finish on a G6 chord. It'll probably be tomorrow evening before I get a chance to get hold of the guitar and hopefully record this.

:D :D :D

Vic

"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)


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(@straycat)
Noble Member
Joined: 18 years ago
Posts: 1282
 

listened to "earth angel" - like it.
looks like your lyrics gonna make a fun song to sing along to.
just wondering- the "looking" in"the future's looking clear" feels a bit awkward for me.. couldn't put the finge ron it though and have no suggestions either (maybe something like "the future's ___ is clear" .... "the future's skies are clear"? hm... awkward )

looking forward to hear this,
straycat.

"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin


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(@davidhodge)
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Joined: 14 years ago
Posts: 4485
 

Hi Vic

I'm with Straycat on this one, except I'm kind of iffy on the whol last verse. It's like you suddenly changed narrators from one who's fairly simple and direct to one who's trying to be more of a poet. No way the guy who wrote the bridge also wrote:

This girl's still here allayed all my fears
That she's too good for me, or out of my league,
And the future's looking clear.

Not really sure yet what to do with it. I'll try to put some thought into it over the next few days. Looking forward to the MP3.

Peace


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(@chris-c)
Famed Member
Joined: 16 years ago
Posts: 3460
 

Hi Vic,

The words looked to have the right feel for the period, although I must say I can't recall Earth Angel, so I'd better get Googling...

OK, I found a version by some soldier guy...who he?... Earth Angel

Looking forward to the Mp3, as I've now realised that even with a chord progression, with no rhythm guide I really don't have much idea how songs will sound. Oops gotta go, the buzzer just went off, so I'm supposed to be somewhere else now... When I get back I'll try combining the Earth Angel style with the chords and see if I can work out how it should go. Interesting learning exercise...

Chris


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(@vic-lewis-vl)
Illustrious Member
Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 10340
Topic starter  

I'm with Straycat on this one, except I'm kind of iffy on the whol last verse. It's like you suddenly changed narrators from one who's fairly simple and direct to one who's trying to be more of a poet. No way the guy who wrote the bridge also wrote:

This girl's still here allayed all my fears
That she's too good for me, or out of my league,
And the future's looking clear.

It's that one word isn't it - "allayed!" I didn't want to use "took away" again - I'd used it in the 2nd verse - so I whipped out the old thesaurus. Didn't seem to be many words that actually fitted with the rhythm - "eliminated" looked and felt clumsy, same goes for "removed" - "downplayed" and "negated" just didn't feel right, either. Maybe "she blew away my fears" or "threw away my fears" would work better, although I'M a bit iffy with those!

Here I am, guitar in hand, ready to record - and I'm fretting over one word! GRRRR!

EDIT - ah, think I've got it - how about "This girl's still here, brushed aside my fears".....or brushed away? or swept away? Decisions, decisions!

:D :D :D

Vic

"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)


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 pbee
(@pbee)
Noble Member
Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 2097
 

How about
This girl's still here and gone are my fears
That she's too good for me, or out of my league,
And the future's looking clear
cheers
Paul


Check out my Reverbnation page here


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(@vic-lewis-vl)
Illustrious Member
Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 10340
Topic starter  

How about
This girl's still here and gone are my fears
That she's too good for me, or out of my league,
And the future's looking clear
cheers
Paul

I like it - thanks Paul! Simple but effective, which is exactly what I was looking for. Amazing how you can get hung up over one word or a phrase, isn't it!

Right - football on TV - I'll have a bash at recording it later - I'll practise on unplugged electric while watching the Liverpool V Atletico Madrid match, get the rhythm and phrasing down. Later............

:D :D :D

Vic

"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)


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(@katreich)
Honorable Member
Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 689
 

I'm as old as you are Vic, and I know earth angel very well. Actually. even my son probably heard it in Back to the Future!
nothing to add as far as content, but I'm looking forward to hearing the music.

Falling in love is like learning to play the guitar; first you learn to follow the rules, then you learn to play with your heart.

www.soundclick.com/kathyreichert


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 KR2
(@kr2)
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Joined: 14 years ago
Posts: 2725
 

How about
This girl's still here and gone are my fears
That she's too good for me and out of my league,
And the future's looking clear

cheers
Paul

or singular so the words rhyme: here - fear - clear
This girl's still here and gone is my fear
That she's too good for me, or out of my league,
And the future's looking clear

It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.


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(@vic-lewis-vl)
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Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 10340
Topic starter  

I went with "gone are my fears" in the end - plural, as I've described two of them in the next line. Here - fears - clear....not perfect, but close enough for rock'n'roll.

Anyway, like it says in the EDIT at the top of the first post, I managed to get a rough first demo done on the digicam -

http://s13.photobucket.com/albums/a279/viclewis/?action=view&current=MOV00218.flv

I've said before, men shouldn't even think of singing falsetto unless they're called Frankie Valli, so please excuse my dodgy falsetto (with the accent on "false!") as I had to sing it that way - an octave lower's even harder for me. Not my favourite key, G. Pretty pleased that I managed to get through it in one take though, with no outrageous fluffs - well, one run-through and one take, anyway. Should have had the camera rolling for the run-through - isn't it always the case that the best take's the one you missed!

Can't wait for January, when I'll be able to pick up some decent recording equipment! Till then you'll probably have to make do with more dodgy video clips....unless anyone knows how to separate the soundfiles from the video?

:D :D :D

Vic

"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)


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 KR2
(@kr2)
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Posts: 2725
 

Like I said earlier this week . . . with each song, you get better.

Don't ya wish you could time warp and be writing this stuff in the 50's and 60's?
You wouldn't need to win the lottery then.

It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.


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(@chris-c)
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Joined: 16 years ago
Posts: 3460
 

. . . with each song, you get better.

+1 :)

I thoroughly enjoyed the clip. It was a bonus to be able to watch your hands at work too.

The interesting thing is, that after a couple of years of listening to my own attempts I seem to have developed a sort of mental filter that can turn what I'm hearing into what I wanted it to be, and even add accompaniments. So even though that was, as you said a "rough demo" it nailed the feel and took me right back to the 50s/60s era. Thanks to my built in fix-up filter, you sang it like a bird and every note was in the right place. You even got some strings in the arrangement there for a while...

Good one.

Chris


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(@katreich)
Honorable Member
Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 689
 

Sweet Vic. I can hear the doo wops in the background! I love the last note as well.

Falling in love is like learning to play the guitar; first you learn to follow the rules, then you learn to play with your heart.

www.soundclick.com/kathyreichert


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(@leear)
Reputable Member
Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 394
 

When I first watched the video the opening lines remind me of a very old song called "These Arms of Mine" but then you take a twist and go to a 50's style song with the way you play it. I LIKE IT!!!

I Need to get on the ball! I just can't seem to get anything going.

No matter where you go.... There You are! Law of Location


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 pbee
(@pbee)
Noble Member
Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 2097
 

Nice video Vic,

your guitar works really captures that era

cheers
Paul


Check out my Reverbnation page here


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