Skip to content
Notifications
Clear all

Y9W18 - Golden

5 Posts
4 Users
0 Likes
1,381 Views
stikman
(@stikman)
Reputable Member
Joined: 14 years ago
Posts: 237
Topic starter  

http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=10342292

Golden

Got money in my pocket warm sun on my back
Skipping down the sidewalk avoiding the cracks

Life is golden good to me
Life is golden good to me
Life is golden good to me
Life is golden good to me

Got a tank full of gasoline and your by my side
Driving down the highway our cares left behind

You are golden good for me
You are golden good for me
You are golden good for me
You are golden good for me

Had a couple sips of bourbon I'm feeling so fine
All my friends are here with me dancing in a line

Life is golden good to me
Life is golden good to me
Life is golden good to me
Life is golden good to me

"All battles are first won or lost in the mind." - Joan of Arc

"It took me about 20 years to figure out how to write without inspiration. Thankfully, I got there." - Leon Russell


   
Quote
jamestoffee
(@jamestoffee)
Famed Member
Joined: 14 years ago
Posts: 2855
 

Hi Ernie,

Good start :D

Suggestions: These are more personal preferences, so take or leave what works for you.
Consider singing the chorus in 3 lines instead of 4 -cutting out the 3rd time as it's a repeat of the first line musically
Consider moving the chord progressions in an upward direction instead of down
Consider the "believability" of the singer....I'm having a hard time hearing these two lines coming from the same person at a particular moment in their lives
Skipping down the sidewalk avoiding the cracks
Had a couple sips of bourbon I'm feeling so fine
---sounds like two different characters to me

Maybe for v1 it could be "today is golden" then the progression is from short term to long term time frames- today, you (relationship), life

In all it's a bit more laid back than what I was expecting on the read. I was picturing something more "pop"....maybe it goes back to the "skipping down the sidewalk"----anticipating a playfulness in the delivery.

Again most if not all more preference driven suggestions-

Thanks for sharing.

James


   
ReplyQuote
martin-6
(@martin-6)
Honorable Member
Joined: 18 years ago
Posts: 418
 

I kind of agree with James about the song sounding like different characters. Are you a hometown boy, a roadtripper, or a party animal? Sure, it's possible to be all three within a day, but the song might hit harder if the setting didn't keep changing.

Also, I was somehow expecting it to sound more optimistic. I think this could be down to the chords you are using over "good for me". I think the line ought to sound happier, sunnier, more Beach Boys.

But that's just me. You've recorded the song and if you like it, no need to change anything.


   
ReplyQuote
stikman
(@stikman)
Reputable Member
Joined: 14 years ago
Posts: 237
Topic starter  

Thanks for the suggestions I can see how it is confusing. I started out thinking a Dan Zanes quasi-kid party song...the bourbon line is not nailed in place :D. It is all supposed to be upbeat and playful so I''ll get some new more appropriate chords. I really just liked the C/G and Am7 and the way the melody line sounded over them but I'm all for changing it.

Ernie

"All battles are first won or lost in the mind." - Joan of Arc

"It took me about 20 years to figure out how to write without inspiration. Thankfully, I got there." - Leon Russell


   
ReplyQuote
John Sargent
(@john-sargent)
Noble Member
Joined: 13 years ago
Posts: 946
 

This song staddles the line of week 18-19. Premonition made you write it?


   
ReplyQuote