I'm not sure what this is.
Could be a chorus, a verse , or maybe even a very short song.
I think I'll call it a germ of a song.
Anyways it's all I've got and I won't be around until after the weekend.
Think of it in a Dwight Yoakam style (Lots of TWANG)
Pocket Full Of Dreams
I've got a pocket full of dreams
And a suitcase full of sorrow
Think I'll pack my old guitar
And head off for tomorrow
Tonight I'll drink a final toast
To the way things use to be
And find out what a man can get
For a pocket full of dreams
Celt
COOL, sounds like some traditional country music(Hank sr., lefty, or maybe some old Red Sovine) Good start, hope to see the finished song soon---the dog
COOL, sounds like some traditional country music(Hank sr., lefty, or maybe some old Red Sovine) Good start, hope to see the finished song soon---the dog
I must agree with smoking dog here and also would love to see the finish product
cheers
Aghhhh
Not only am I a senior citizen
I'm now a bloody senior member
Are you people trying to tell me I'm old or what ?
over 700 posts ( I really do need to get out more )
hey :wink:
I have to second the comments, I love what you got so far.
guess it would work well as a chorus but if you should be unable to get more for it(verses...) I believe it would also work very well as a little song, just on its own.
maybe with a nice long instrumental solo/intro/outro.
whatever it's up to you.
I for one enjoyed reading;)
bluenightangel
"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin
Hey Celt,
This would make a terrific chorus. I'm a HUGE Dwight Yoakam fan, and easily see it in that style. Hope you can cobble some verses to go along with it.
-- Scratch 8)
"...if heartaches were commercials, we'd all be on TV" -- John Prine
42
Indeed, I see great potential in this! If you picture an image for each line , it has an amazing flow to it... you can 'see' this person wanting a change in their life, you can 'see' events leading up to this change (Today I'll drink a final toast to the way things used to be) and summing it up is the idea of all they have is a 'pocket full of dreams'.. a great analogy.. I luv it! :wink:
gw
J :)
"Iam a question to the world... not an answer to be heard."
Hi ,
Thanks for all the kind words.
I believe the vote came in as chorus. Or at least that what I tried to do with it. As Scratchmonkey put it I tried to "cobble" a couple of verses to go with it. Anyways I hope it came out alright.
Pocket Full Of Dreams
(Chorus )
I've got a pocket full of dreams
And a suitcase full of sorrow
Gonna pack this old guitar
And head off for tomorrow
Tonight I'll drink a final toast
To the way things use to be
And see how far a man can get
On a pocket full of dreams
(Verse 1)
When I told you I was leavin'
It's like you didn't hear a word
You just keep believin'
All that gossip that you heard
I can't tell you how our love
Somewhere came off the track
But tommorrow I'll be on my way
And I won't be looking back
(Chorus)
(Verse 2)
You know Jimmy down there at the bar
I'll tell him where to send my mail
And if there's anything I've left behind
You can put it up for sale
I gave you all the best I had
In Life or so it seems
And all I have left for myself
Is this pocket full of dreams
(Chorus)
Celt
Outstanding, Celt. This is beautiful.
The only thing I might suggest, would be to trim the verses a bit. (just a bit) for instance,
So you just keep believin' -- to -- You just keep believin'
or
I can not tell you how our love -- to -- I can't tell you how our love
Especially in the style you've mentioned, contractions would sound more natural, I think.
Even as is, though, it's wonderful.
-- Scratch 8)
"...if heartaches were commercials, we'd all be on TV" -- John Prine
42
Hi Scratch,
Thanks, I will keep your advice in mind. After reading what you did with this piece(Week 10) I'll be going over again anyway.
Celt
