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Year 5 Week 51 Reservoir Road - Celt / Blueline

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chefie
(@chefie)
Prominent Member
Joined: 18 years ago
Posts: 553
Topic starter  

Okay, I took the challenge. As Blueline said, Celt's Reservior Road is a haunting title . . . . and Blueline's chorus is out of the ordinary. I knda see the chorus part sung, part spoken. Anyway, here are some verses I came up with, though not complete by any means.

Neil

Reservoir Road -Celt Chorus by Blueline

They both caught the light there on Reservoir Road
And for a brief moment they shared a passing glance
He saw a lifetime of sadness in her eyes
Sometimes, stories can't be told

but they were two travelers on the same road
traveling together until it got old
they met for the last time where dead ends meet
they turned there heads and strapped into their seats

and they turned, went their different direction
no light ahead
they turned and separated, no more affection
nothing left to be said

They both caught the light there on Reservoir Road
And for a brief moment they shared a passing glance
He saw a lifetime of sadness in her eyes
Sometimes, stories can't be told

where they go it's up to them
they can only look back at where they've been
one life shattered, one life wrecked
and it's never really over, what the heck

who understands, who relates
doesn't matter
the end came for them much too late
time to scatter

They both caught the light there on Reservoir Road
And for a brief moment they shared a passing glance
He saw a lifetime of sadness in her eyes
Sometimes, stories can't be told


   
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DrunkRock
(@drunkrock)
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Joined: 16 years ago
Posts: 159
 

As a spoken/Dylan-esque song, this might work. But there are some issues with the verses; mainly that the length varies significantly. Makes it pretty hard for me to come up with a good melody with such a big difference in syllables.

I'm an amatuer at this so take it with a grain of salt. If it works for you, it works. It's nice to see another take on this.


   
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chefie
(@chefie)
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Joined: 18 years ago
Posts: 553
Topic starter  

Actually, DrunkRock, the only line that I envisioned to be spoken, was
And for a brief moment they shared a passing glance
The balance was sung. And it's true, there's a different meter in the verses . . . . . I did this intentionally since the chorus neither rhymed or lent itself to a certain rhythm for me. I'll try to do an MP3 of this tonight and post it so you have a better Idea about what I was thinking.

Neil


   
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Montezuma
(@montezuma)
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Joined: 15 years ago
Posts: 121
 

Hi there,
Loved lines like:
they met for the last time where dead ends meet
they turned and separated, no more affection

lines that didnt work for me:
they turned there heads and strapped into their seats
time to scatter

I like the metaphor of reservoir road being the end of the journey for the couple.

Have you posted the mp3 yet?

Nice work
Ola

“Poetry and Hums aren't things which you get, they're things which get you. And all you can do is go where they can find you.” - Winnie the Pooh


   
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Bob
 Bob
(@bob)
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Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 908
 

Hi Neill

I kind of get where you're trying to go with this and I think it's only two lines short of getting you there:
but they were two travelers on the same road
traveling together until it got old
they met for the last time where dead ends meet
they turned there heads and strapped into their seats

to

but they were two travelers on the same road
traveling together until it got old
they met for the last time where dead ends meet
strung out on life and dead on their feet

Also
the end came for them much too late
time to scatter

to

when the end came for them too it just
made them sadder

You could leave out the too as well as it neither adds nor detracts.

Good start though and good interpretation of the chorus

Bob :wink:

My Soundclick Page

You are what you eat, eat well


   
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chefie
(@chefie)
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Joined: 18 years ago
Posts: 553
Topic starter  

Hey Bob,

I really liked your suggestions! I've incorporated them into the MP3 . . . . .

http://www.soundclick.com/neilstuart

Neil


   
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