First of all I'd like to thank Bob for putting me on the spot this week.
I'm not totally satisfied with this but let's run it up the flag pole as they say.
Simplest Of Pleasures
You were the simplest of pleasures
When it was the simplest of times
And the words that you said
Went to my head
Like the fragrance of strawberry wine
The coffee you brewed in the morning
The love that we made every night
And the sound of your voice
Left me no choice
But to believe everything was alright
Then I had to complicate matters
Saying I had to search for my soul
You should have been the rest of my life
I was just to blind to know
Cause you were the simplest of pleasures
When it was the simplest of times
And the words that you said
Went to my head
Like the fragrance of strawberry wine
And when I heard that you found another
I could have laid down and died
If I had the chance
To change circumstance
I could have at least said I tried
How could I be such a fool
How could I leave you behind
How could I ever forsake what we had
I must have been out of my mind
Cause you were the simplest of pleasures
When it was the simplest of times
And the words that you said
Went to my head
Like the fragrance of strawberry wine
Yes you were the simplest of pleasures
When it was the simplest of times
And the words that you said
Went to my head
Like the fragrance of strawberry wine
John
Hi John,
You were the simplest of pleasures
When it was the simplest of times
Lovely thought . . . . . well put.
Neil
I really like this. Sounds like a dreamy waltz time would fit like Tennessee Waltz.
Hi John!
You should have been the rest of my life
I love that line!
Are you going to post an MP3?
Gwynne.
Thank you
I really like this. Sounds like a dreamy waltz time would fit like Tennessee Waltz.
That's pretty much what I had in mind .
Are you going to post an MP3?
I hope to but life is a little busy right now so it may be a while.
John
Hi John
+1 for the waltz. It's going to sound sweet.
Only suggestion is to make a couple of tweaks here, changing:
Then I had to complicate matters
Saying I had to search for my soul
You should have been the rest of my life
I was just to blind to know
To
Then I had to complicate matters
Going to search for my soul
You should have been the rest of my life
But I was just too blind to know
Looking forward to hearing the music on this.
Peace
Hmm, seems everyone's thinking waltz - I was thinking this'd make a nice C&W ballad, possibly with lap steel. (Correct me if I'm wrong, though, aren't waltzes normally in 3/4 time? And isn't a lot of C&W in 3/4 time?)
Lyrically, I don't think this could be improved much - you say you're not totally satisfied John, but maybe a few minor tweaks are all it needs. The only thing I'd change is starting the song with the repeated refrain. Maybe that's just me though - I can't honestly think of one song, off the top of my head, that starts with the chorus.
Anyway, nicely written, I'll look forward to hearing this.
:D :D :D
Vic
"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)
The only thing I'd change is starting the song with the repeated refrain. Maybe that's just me though - I can't honestly think of one song, off the top of my head, that starts with the chorus.
Bye Bye Love
The Continuing Saga of Bungalow Bill
That'll Be The Day
But, as you can tell from my photos - there's nothing on the top of my head... :wink:
Often opening with the chorus, especially if it's very catchy, can keep you from writing an extra verse that isn't as up to par as the other verses. At least that's what I use them for!
Peace
The only thing I'd change is starting the song with the repeated refrain. Maybe that's just me though - I can't honestly think of one song, off the top of my head, that starts with the chorus.
Bye Bye Love
The Continuing Saga of Bungalow Bill
That'll Be The Day
She Loves You
Can't Buy Me Love
Eleanor Rigby
Hi John,
Nice song....again.... :) You seem to gave the gift (or rather you've probably put all the work in over the years that's needed to make the good look straightforward...) of writing lyrics that read like songs right off the page. I was humming/singing along almost from the start.
Cheers,
Chris
hey john.
wow, this gets to me.
... i'm wondering if a certain someone will someday be able to relate to that song :cry:
well, i hope you're recording this soon.
( :oops: ... recording... er.. yes.. i should try that, too)
i like the suggestion of changing "Saying I had to search for my soul" to "Going to search for my soul" (or "leaving to search.."?)..
really like this.
cheers,
straycat.
"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin
... i'm wondering if a certain someone will someday be able to relate to that song :cry:
I hope not,I've had the "Simple Pleasure" of being with my lovely wife for over 30 years.
(that certain someone.. was not meaning myself, nor you.. in case that was misunderstood :) )
"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin
Straycat,
No, I was taking it that you meant it was autobiographic when it isn't.
Sometimes when I'm writing I see myself more as a novelist than self exploration.
Of course I always hope the emotions ring true.
John
Hi John
This is a lovely piece, with a real heartfelt sentiment sticking out strongly. I understand you with the novelist analogy as it's what I tend to do as well.
Seems the line that's creating a lot of discussion is
Saying I had to search for my soul
in the spirit of the assignment (keeping it simple) I'd just say
By searching for my soul
That aside I think it's great as it stands
Bob :wink:
You are what you eat, eat well
