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Year 6 Wk 22 When You Shake Hands With The Devil

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 Celt
(@celt)
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Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 2649
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Think John Lee Hooker

When You Shake Hands With The Devil

When you shake hands with the Devil
Your blood runs bitter cold
Get a shiver up and down your spine
As you try to break his hold
When you shake hands with the Devil
Better keep your other hand on your soul

The Devil's like that woman
Who will steal then break your heart
Build you to be King of the World
Then turn and tear you apart
The Devil's like that woman
Who will steal then break your heart

When you shake hands with the Devil
Your blood runs bitter cold
Get a shiver up and down your spine
As you try to break his hold
When you shake hands with the Devil
Better keep your other hand on to your soul

The Devil's like that Boss Man
Always trying to keep you down
He ain't got no self respect
So he keeps on beating yours into the ground
The Devil's like that Boss Man
Always trying to keep you down

When you shake hands with the Devil
Your blood runs bitter cold
Get a shiver up and down your spine
As you try to break his hold
When you shake hands with the Devil
Better keep your other hand on to your soul

Thanks
John

My SoundClick Page

Collaborations

" It's easier than waiting around to die" Townes Van Zandt


   
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(@pearlthekat)
Noble Member
Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 1468
 

imho, the first verse is so great that the second one seems a little weak. not that it is weak it's just that it follows somethiing real strong. the Boss man verse is somewhere in between. summary: work on the second verse!


   
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(@vic-lewis-vl)
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Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 10264
 

I noticed a strange thing with this song, namely these two lines....

"When you shake hands with the Devil
Better keep your other hand on your soul"

Even though they're both grammatically correct, it LOOKS wrong to me; hands (plural) in one line, hand (singular) in the next - first thing that went through my mind was, "How many hands has this feller got?" I know, I know, you only use one hand (commonly) to shake hands...so yes, you would have the other hand free. But it still just looks wrong!

I was thinking maybe "When you shake the devil by the hand".....but that doesn't read as well. "When you shake the devil's hand" - still doesn't read as well as the original. Only thing I could think of was to change the other line slightly - "Better keep one hand on your soul."

OK, pedantic nit-pick over - and who said the blues had to be gramatically and linguistically perfect anyway? :D

As for the rest of the song, I tried playing it in E - seems fine apart from a couple of places where I stumbled over the meter;

"So he keeps on beating yours into the ground" seemed one or two syllables too many, depending on phrasing - I tried "He keeps tryin' to beat yours into the ground" which seemed to flow a little smoother.

"Get a shiver up and down your spine" seemed to be easier to sing as "Get the shivers down your spine"....

Apart from those trifling little petty nit-picky insignificant quibbles, it reads fine - sounds good too, especially with a JLH rhythm in mind - almost lethally addictive to play, I hard a hard time putting the guitar down long enough to type!

Oh, one little question - are you thinking same rhythm/melody for the verses and choruses (ie all the way through) or one rhythm/melody for the verses, and another for the choruses? The latter way seemed to work better for me...

:D :D :D

Vic

"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)


   
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(@scrybe)
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Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 2241
 

I noticed a strange thing with this song, namely these two lines....

"When you shake hands with the Devil
Better keep your other hand on your soul"

Even though they're both grammatically correct, it LOOKS wrong to me; hands (plural) in one line, hand (singular) in the next - first thing that went through my mind was, "How many hands has this feller got?" I know, I know, you only use one hand (commonly) to shake hands...so yes, you would have the other hand free. But it still just looks wrong!

I was thinking maybe "When you shake the devil by the hand".....but that doesn't read as well. "When you shake the devil's hand" - still doesn't read as well as the original. Only thing I could think of was to change the other line slightly - "Better keep one hand on your soul."

how about.......

when you shake hands with the devil
you loose your grip on your own soul

?

i really like this tune. but I grew up on blues, so any crossroads-style doomsday devil song is likely to appeal to my predilections. 8)

Ra Er Ga.

Ninjazz have SuperChops.

http://www.blipfoto.com/Scrybe


   
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(@pearlthekat)
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Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 1468
 

i like, keep one hand on your soul....


   
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(@rum-runner)
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Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 424
 

That'sa real cool, John. I like the theme, warning about dealing with the devil, and then comparing him to others you might know in your life. And some real good imagery, too. I also vote with the others about the last line in the chorus. Ihad an idea but than I read pearl's post and I think her idea probably works even better. Mike would have been a right hand/left hand thing, but the "one hand" line I think is cleaner.

Had an idea about the forst verse. I thought the line after King of the World was a little awkward. How about replacing it with something like "... then tear your world apart"- adds a touch of irony there.

Also the line in the second verse after the boss man having no self respect. Same concern but I can't think of a fix offhand.

Otherwise real cool.

Regards,

Mike

"Growing Older But Not UP!"


   
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 KR2
(@kr2)
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Posts: 2717
 

Another verse?
Maybe something like the devil's in the next drink?

The devil's like the next drink
You drink to drown your sorrow
But you're just swallowing another problem
And your soul will be gasping for air
When you drink to hide from your fate
The Devil will buy the next round

No rhyme but the thought is there.
Making it rhyme is your job.

It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.


   
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(@lavadave)
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Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 54
 

I like the Boss man, but does he TRY to keep you down or does he actually do it:

Maybe something like:

The Devil's like the Boss man
he ain't got no respect
always beats he you to the ground
with his foot up on your neck
the devil's like the boss man
he ain't got no respect


   
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 Celt
(@celt)
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Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 2649
Topic starter  

Wow,
Thanks everybody I love all the suggestions.

I guess I have quite a bit to think about so I will get back
to you all later.

John

My SoundClick Page

Collaborations

" It's easier than waiting around to die" Townes Van Zandt


   
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 Celt
(@celt)
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Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 2649
Topic starter  

Well It's Later,
imho, the first verse is so great that the second one seems a little weak. not that it is weak it's just that it follows somethiing real strong. the Boss man verse is somewhere in between. summary: work on the second verse!

Good point maybe if I work it into a more traditional verse/chorus structure.
I noticed a strange thing with this song, namely these two lines....

"When you shake hands with the Devil
Better keep your other hand on your soul"
"Better keep one hand on your soul."

"So he keeps on beating yours into the ground" seemed one or two syllables too many, depending on phrasing - I tried "He keeps tryin' to beat yours into the ground" which seemed to flow a little smoother.

"Get a shiver up and down your spine" seemed to be easier to sing as "Get the shivers down your spine"....

Oh, one little question - are you thinking same rhythm/melody for the verses and choruses (ie all the way through) or one rhythm/melody for the verses, and another for the choruses? The latter way seemed to work better for me...

Lots of good points and I tried to address them all in the rewrite. Yes it would be the same all the way though.
how about.......

when you shake hands with the devil
you loose your grip on your own soul

?

i really like this tune. but I grew up on blues, so any crossroads-style doomsday devil song is likely to appeal to my predilections.

Sorry I went with Vic's suggestion but it's funny you mention "Crossroads" because this started with a
Robert Johnson groove but John Lee worked a little better or maybe not.
Had an idea about the forst verse. I thought the line after King of the World was a little awkward. How about replacing it with something like "... then tear your world apart"- adds a touch of irony there.

Also the line in the second verse after the boss man having no self respect. Same concern but I can't think of a fix offhand.

Maybe something like:

The Devil's like the Boss man
he ain't got no respect
always beats he you to the ground
with his foot up on your neck
the devil's like the boss man
he ain't got no respect

Definitely some food for thought that I digested during rewrite.
Another verse?
Maybe something like the devil's in the next drink?

You asked for it. I loved the "next drink angle".

When You Shake Hands With The Devil (Edit)

The Devil's like that woman
Who will steal then break your heart
Treat you like the King of the World
Then tear that world apart
The Devil's like that woman
Who will steal then break your heart

When you shake hands with the Devil
Your blood runs bitter cold
Get a shiver down your spine
As you try to break his hold
When you shake hands with the Devil
Better keep one hand on your soul

The Devil's like that Boss Man
All he does is keep you down
He don't give you no respect
Keeps beating you to the ground
The Devil's like that Boss Man
All he does is keep you down

When you shake hands with the Devil
Your blood runs bitter cold
Get a shiver down your spine
As you try to break his hold
When you shake hands with the Devil
Better keep one hand on your soul

The Devil's like that next drink
When you swore you had your last
You'll only find more sorrow
In the bottom of the glass
The Devil's like that next drink
When you swore you had your last

When you shake hands with the Devil
Your blood runs bitter cold
Get a shiver down your spine
As you try to break his hold
When you shake hands with the Devil
Better keep one hand on your soul

Thank You All

John

My SoundClick Page

Collaborations

" It's easier than waiting around to die" Townes Van Zandt


   
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(@lavadave)
Trusted Member
Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 54
 

It reads great.


   
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 KR2
(@kr2)
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Joined: 17 years ago
Posts: 2717
 

I like it too.
Assignment completed?
When can we expect to hear the mp3?

It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.


   
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(@vic-lewis-vl)
Illustrious Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 10264
 

Looks done, dusted, polished and finished to me. Waiting for the MP3.

*taps foot impatiently*

*taps foot impatiently*

*taps foot impatiently*

*taps foot impatiently*

:D :D :D

Vic

"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)


   
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(@rum-runner)
Reputable Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 424
 

Latest version is great, John. It flows much better. Amazing what just a few little tweaks would do, eh?

Regards,

Mike

"Growing Older But Not UP!"


   
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(@barnabus-rox)
Famed Member
Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 2957
 

John

I really enjoyed reading this and how the comments from others played their part on the edit ...

I am very keen and eager to listen how this is transported into music , I am hearing a lot of sound effects like hissing ....

Just my weird mind ...

Nice one John

Cheers

Trev.. :wink:

Here is to you as good as you are
And here is to me as bad as I am
As good as you are and as bad as I am
I'm as good as you are as bad as I am


   
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