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hi all,first 2 vers...
 
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hi all,first 2 verses and a chorus....any comments welcome

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(@gaz-uk)
Estimable Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 148
Topic starter  

the story of a girl

v1
oh her life was simple
and ripped along the seams
she was on the edge of reality
and her long lasting dreams

v2
in a world that only she knew
she was lonely and cunfused
all she needed was some affection
all she wanted was some attention

chorus
this is the story of a girl
who was looked down on by the world
too shy to stand up and fight them
she wouldnt turn for help from friends

thanks for reading....gaz :D

"people laugh at me because im different...i pity you..because your all the same"


   
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(@ghost)
Prominent Member
Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 815
 

The chorus is cool. Verse 1 is too.

Verse 2 could also be a chorus if you wanted it to be.

The last two lines,

"all she needed was some affection
all she needed was some attention"

are what reminded me of a chorus.

Hope I could be some help...Ghost

"If I had a time machine, I'd go back and tell me to practise that bloody guitar!" -Vic Lewis

Everything is 42..... again.


   
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