Hello, my first post here.
Actually, i've never really been into theory about writing songs. I've been writing for a couple of years now and allways thought that writing songs is something you do, not something you learn.
It looks like I was wrong.
As I was going through the net today I came over: Songwriting for Beginners By Nick Torres and it made sense. A lot of sense actually. And now i'm very ready to develop, and get better. This is my first song. I like it very well myself. But critiques are of course welcome. Knock yourself out!
The true Book:
So the power and glory
Didn't bring you a friend
And the people that you counted on
was gone in the end
Is this the way you want to end your life?
With a whole load of money
and your only friend, a knife
Follow the true book and find yourself
Chapter one, everyone is precious
Chapter two, when it comes to being good
all the power in the world
cant cope with the glory of true love
The truth is true
even for you
but the people around
know you havent found
The place no one knows
where the water glows
where the wind is free
and you can see
That the man you tried to be like
liked to be like you. And you like the fact
that what he likes, is what you like to be
Follow the true book, know what it is?
Left of your heart
The feeling of your first kiss
Knowing your alive
The boy that are alone
but still he tries to play
The only thing thats sure
Is not that where gonna die
But that we are
Know yourself
Dont be afraid to die
See that joy can be
to watch at the sky
See that joy can be
To smile at everyone
See that joy can be
Larger than life
See that you can be
larger than life
:)
hello! for a first post this is good! i love your style and your lyrics but however there are a few problems..one obvious thing was that the flow was all over the place, i think you need to give it some structure which doesnt involve changing the song just rearranging! secondly there were a couple of lines that didnt make sense for grammatical reason i.e..
And the people that you counted on
was gone in the end
i think the bottom line should be..
Were all gone in the end
and i didnt understand this..
The only thing thats sure
Is not that where gonna die
But that we are
But however confsing these few lines were (and im not sure if i get them) i loved it..
That the man you tried to be like
liked to be like you. And you like the fact
that what he likes, is what you like to be
Good Job overall, its very touching, keep it up!
Thanks for the plug...
Thank you for usefull feedback!
First of all, the grammar can be bad. Im Norwegian and therefore, my english isnt first language. But I try. Thank you for correcting it.
I am afraid I dont think I understand, what you mean about the structure and so. And since it was the thing you noticed most. I would really like if you could explain.
I kind of agree about the line you didnt understand. My second thoughts is that it is probably just me who understands it. But again. Thank you!
