This is feeling like a Seinfeld episode.
For several months, I've been involved with this band. We have no name and no gigs booked. We practice every week and get through about maybe 5 or 6 songs per practice. Musicianship is adequate. The song selection is really safe. The whole setup is like attending my Dad's lodge meeting. I am not having fun and have in fact come home from the past number of practices snarling.
Yesterday I jammed with these other musicians and it crackled. We got through about 15 songs, the musicianship was great and it felt like a band and not a bridge club. I was dubious about playing with them because the style of music went completely against my grain. But I learned the songs and was amazed at how much I really enjoyed myself. This band has gigs booked and an established identity. Practices are monthly with members fully expected to hone their chops by doing their homework.
I want to leave this other group, and I realize doing the right thing will take me out of the comfort zone. However, I don't wish to hurt anyone's feelings or bruise any egos. I also work with two of those band members.
Be honest and plan what you will say to them in advance, then stick to it. It's easier to avoid conflict if you don't have to think up reasons for leaving or appear open to persuasion. Make sure this is what you want first though (why not do both bands for a bit, maybe put some pressure on the "bridge club band" to step it up over the next few months while you do both?).
Really, the worst thing you could do is just stop showing up! I've had that happen a couple of times in a couple of bands, both times with a bass player! (Oh! And then there was a keyboard player who found another band and didn't show up for 6 months or so, then tried to come back. We, as a band, said, "No thank you very much".) You're just going to have to "man up" and tell the first band that you've played with this new band and that you think they're a better fit for you right now. Don't burn your bridges. You may want/need to play with them again one day. You want to stay on good terms with as many musicians as possible because you never know when one of them will get into a great situation and think of you when it's time to find a new guitarist. You don't want to be thought of as irresponsible and unreliable like one of the best bass players I've ever had the pleasure to play with. He's amazing when he plays!! But, he may show up, he may not, or his bass is in the pawn shop so "if you need me for the gig you're going to have to get my gear out of hock and still pay me my portion of the gig money even though you DID get my bass and amp out of the pawn shop and I'll probably never pay you back for it". As much as I love to play with the guy, musically, I'll never have him in a band again. So, just be up front about it. The truth will set you free!
:D
..· ´¨¨)) -:¦:-
¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
((¸¸.·´ .·´
-:¦:- ((¸¸.·´ -:¦:- Elecktrablue -:¦:-
"Don't wanna ride no shootin' star. Just wanna play on the rhythm guitar." Emmylou Harris, "Rhythm Guitar" from "The Ballad of Sally Rose"
Vic makes notes in case his guitars end up hocked again....
im sure if they are a decent bunch of guys they will understand where your comming from - good luck with it!!
"I like to play that guitar. I have to stare at it while I'm playing it because I'm not very good at playing it."
Noel Gallagher (who took the words right out of my mouth)
A man's gotta do, what a man's gotta do. :oops:
It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.
For several months, I've been involved with this band. We have no name and no gigs booked. We practice every week and get through about maybe 5 or 6 songs per practice. Musicianship is adequate. The song selection is really safe. The whole setup is like attending my Dad's lodge meeting. I am not having fun and have in fact come home from the past number of practices snarling.
I want to leave this other group, and I realize doing the right thing will take me out of the comfort zone. However, I don't wish to hurt anyone's feelings or bruise any egos. I also work with two of those band members.
The best thing is to leave now before you start hating them. Be honest. Tell the current band you have another opportunity that fits better with your goals and you'll be leaving to follow it.
Playing guitar and never playing for others is like studying medicine and never working in a clinic.
I think everyone gave you pretty good advice here there is no EASY way to tell them other than being upfront and honest but with that said don't be suprised if someday when you want to come back...they're not going to want you.
There are so many dynamics going on in bands it's not always as easy as just leaving one and going to another. You may find in a couple weeks the other band isn't working out the way you thought it would and then what are you going to do. You really have to know the situation which none of us do. Are the guys your playing with just doing it for fun? Do they have a desire to up their game even if they aren't gigging etc. Can you become a stronger influence on them and get them to where you want to be?
Personally and it's only me I'd rather play with friends and/or people I have more than a musical connection with than playing with a bunch of ringers that only get together to play. In my view there is ALWAYS a better bass player, guitar player etc out there so what do you do, keep jumping from band to band. I guess you could do that but that wouldn't be any fun for me it would seem like work eventually. I did that playing sports ended up on some All-Star teams and yea they played great baseball but it was so much like work after awhile I couldn't take it. Now on the other hand I had a similar situation when I started playing I was playing with some guys from work and they were mediocre at best but still much better than me but they had no desire to learn anything new, would pretty much only play acoustic music and I eventually left them for the current guys I play with, but I never envisioned wanting to go back so it wasn't a big deal.
But we have gone through this with a few people and once they leave they aren't coming back.
"It's all about stickin it to the man!"
It's a long way to the top if you want to rock n roll!
I am not having fun
:wink:
Cat
"Feel what you play...play what you feel!"
