Forgiveness
Shards of glass in a fatal wound,
No more worries - I'm leaving soon.
You're the poison, and you're the knife,
You're the demon that saved my life,
Angel-devil, and not the less,
A heartbreaker, but still the best.
A denial, a myth, a wraith,
Well-known stranger who stole my faith.
I know you're afraid that all alone
You'll make your way through lands of endless rains.
In front of you is only the unknown
Behind your back is just this hollow pain...
Sleeping pills, bittersweet champagne -
I am watching my empty brain
Drowning quickly in alcohol...
But won't drown my longing soul.
In this strife I'm a knight, but scared,
And I'm feeling... oh well, enough!
Now I'll stop... no one fucking cares.
You have never believed in...
In my devotion.
But I'm not afraid that all alone
I'll make my way through lands of endless rains.
In front of me is only the unknown
Behind my back is just this hollow pain...
But with arms broken I'll fight,
By my forgiveness
My broken heart is revived -
I'm alive!
And I'm not afraid that all alone
I'll make my way through lands of endless rains.
In front of me is only the unknown
Behind my back is just this hollow pain...
sung like atreyu? comeon say yes...needs to be! :D good flow on the lyrics :D
Great song potential here ABD
You're first lines
Shards of glass in a fatal wound,
No more worries - I'm leaving soon.
had me completely hooked - they are seriously good opening lines!
My only quibble is the use of "But" to start two consecutive sections;
But I'm not afraid that all alone
I'll make my way through lands of endless rains.
In front of me is only the unknown
Behind my back is just this hollow pain...
But with arms broken I'll fight,
By my forgiveness
My broken heart is revived -
I'm alive!
It just upsets the flow of the song for me.
May I offer;
But I'm not afraid that all alone
I'll make my way through lands of endless rains.
In front of me is only the unknown
Behind my back is just this hollow pain...
And still with arms broken I'll fight,
By my forgiveness
My broken heart is revived -
I'm alive!
That way it seems to be a follow-on to the chorus, not an additional statement. Just an idea, I'm sure you can create something better than that off-the-top-of-my-head attempt.
Any ideas for music? I can imagine this sounding like evanescence, a strong voice combined with heavyish guitars (maybe thats just me though :lol:)
Pete
ETD - Formerly "10141748 - Reincarnate"
yep, i came back and read it again. and i reckon its really good. its great to read therefore should be even better to hear. if you can, download 'her portrait in black' by atreyu, that is what i hear in my head when i read your words.
Thanks to everyone who replied!
I've never heard anything by Atreyu, but Evanescence has definitely been my inpiration for many years, so I wouldn't mind if it sounded like Evanescence.
