New lyrics i wrote - Falling for you

Hi Elledee, welcome to GN!

First off, I think that you've written a nice song here, with some great lyrics and feeling. Well done!! :) :)
Its a shame that I cannot hear the music or tune you had in mind when you wrote this, but I have a tune in my mind
so obviously this might affect some of the advice I am going to write below.

If it's rubbish, ignore me!! :)

I do have a suggestion (and these are from my own experiences, not to be taken as facts! lol);

When writing, I think it is important to think about how your syllables are set out.
If each line has the same number of syllables, a verse can work well.
I personally like the idea of "stepping" syllables, as I've shown below (in this case, going up by 1 in a line, then dropping down for the last line to accomodate);

i.e.
First, I didnt think id find ( 6 )
Someone that makes me smile ( 6 )
The way you make me smile ( 5 )
I thought it couldnt be ( 5 )

While the lyrics are good, the drop of a syllable in the middle of the verse makes the verse feel unbalanced, while a drop at the last line can leave a pause, ready for the next verse.

By altering the lines slightly, you can keep the flow

i.e.
At first, I didn't think I'd find ( 7 )
Somebody that can make me smile ( 7 )
The way that you can make me smile ( 8 )
I thought it coudn't be ( 5 )

IMO it just makes it flow better.

In the next part of the verse, you have a nice easy set of 6 syllables in each line.

But then you came along
And i was proven wrong
Something inside felt strong
The way it made me feel

While this works as a verse in itself, it doesn't seem to flow well with the first section
(neither your original or my interpretation) so perhaps some adjustment is needed here as well?

I think your bridge(s) and chorus work well, so no comments there except for well done :)

You'll probably find that as you write more, you will start to notice little things like this that make all the difference.

Pete

Wow! That's a great song! I really like it and I just wish I could hear the tune to it. It's amazing!

I agree with Pete here ..

One little thing else I would say is ..

you have :

First, I didnt think id find
Someone that makes me smile
The way you make me smile

Which is very good but I think it could be better

First, I didnt think id find
Someone that would make me smile
The way you make me smile

That just fixes up the tenses , past prestent , future ..
No one can actually make you smile per-say
You can feel they make you happy ..
Then the last line there , would be a emotion more then a sentence

This is of course only my opinion , and if you disagree that's all good . I'm only trying to give constructive feed back ..