hey everyone, i wrote this in a sudden burst of inspiration from a wartime movie, so it's still really rough and i was wonderin if there are any suggestions on maybe helping the flow of it and also how i should arrange the lyrics? thank you much for any comments
follow the tank's tracks
down another dirt road
re-sling your rifles
and stretch your elbows
will there be more shooting?
or just another long walk?
with no hot bullets
and our guns staying cocked
loaded, ready and scared
we move through hostility
the ground shakes men die
again, its raining artillery
take cover under that bush
as bullets whiz overhead
i ask, is this for real?im reminded
as good men are falling dead
i guess the cost of victory
is explosions and dying screams
courageous men losing their families
for what? a polititians dreams?
chad
hi chad
I just picked these lines in no particular order
for what? a polititians dreams?
" For what ? the polititians dreams ? ( just thought there is usually more than one )
i ask, is this for real?im reminded
"I ask is this for real man ? ( just thiught it might just add something )
oh well that's my 5 cents worth
cheers
Aghhhh
Not only am I a senior citizen
I'm now a bloody senior member
Are you people trying to tell me I'm old or what ?
over 700 posts ( I really do need to get out more )
would this have nething to do with the war at all? I likey
Do what you love, love what you do
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-Nick
Chad, I thought this was good....tried it a couple different ways..Dylanesque,,blues..straightforward strumming...stiil have a problem with flow...but that could be me...I see this as a good chorus: loaded, ready and scared
we move through hostility
the ground shakes men die
again, its raining artillery
paragraph`s 1,2 and 4 = VS`s
paragraph 5 as a bridge
hope this helps....
You can sleep when you`re dead!
"and baby all you need...is just a little more love"
thanks for the suggestions guy's, i'm still working on puttin some guitar to this i'm not sure what to go with yet... i was thinkin maybe slow minor arpeggios in the beginning while they're just walking and then maybe more intense sounding maybe powerchords when the bombs and artillery start falling, if anyone feels a different type of guitar for this let me know i'm still open to anything suggestions here.
chad
