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Say - Lyric critique wanted

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(@moxey)
Eminent Member
Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 25
Topic starter  

Hi

If you have any comments or suggestions, fire away! thanks in advance for taking the time!

Say

It seems extraordinary we should have no fear
Of the sun and rising tides
Or that the world we live in and all its' glory
Could turn to dust and die

You don't want to believe me
Don't want it to be that way
I don't want to deceive you
When I say

Like convenience junkies, pain of withdrawal
Seems too high a price
The pill is sugar coated, so it goes down easy
To hide the bitterness inside

Why, oh why must we
All toe the line
Each want and need fullfilled for
All to see, for all to see sometimes

In pathetic ritual we act out lives
Numbed by our senseless greed
Forever standing, our hands outreaching
Always, always wanting more

You don't want to believe me
Don't want it to be that way
I don't want to decieve you
When I say...

© John Moxey

Cheers

John

My Music Page
My Songstuff Music Page
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(@mysticmoonangel)
Estimable Member
Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 166
 

hi moxey,

i realy liked the first part of this song this are has left me wanting more i just feel like your not realy saying what you mean and you have alot more to say, good job so far just got to search a little deeper, good luck
Why, oh why must we
All toe the line
Each want and need fullfilled for
All to see, for all to see sometimes

In pathetic ritual we act out lives
Numbed by our senseless greed
Forever standing, our hands outreaching
Always, always wanting more

You don't want to believe me
Don't want it to be that way
I don't want to decieve you
When I say...

mystic :wink:


   
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