what can u tell me?

I liked it very much, I dont really have anything to say that you should change except maybe spacing out your chorus with the part about "swallowing the pain", i just found it jumped in at times when it had happened just before. But i really enjoyed reading this.

Good Song
:mrgreen:

thanks for the tip I will see what I can do

a few changes

LITTLE ONE CRIES

WHY DO U CRY THAT WAY
WISH I COULD HOLD U CLOSE
AN TAKE AWAY YOUR PAIN
IF ONLY I COULD TURN BACK TIME
I'D CLEAR THE SKELITONS OF YOUR MIND
THERES A WORLD OF HORRER
WHEN U CLOSE YOUR EYES
THE LITTLE ONE CRIES DEEP INSIDE
IT'S A DARKENED WORLD
WERE THE SUN DONT SHINE
THE LITTLE ONE CRIES
BUT IT DON'T KNOW WHY

YOU TAKE ANOTHER SWOLLOW
IT EATS UP ALL YOUR PAIN
EVERY THING FEELS BETTER
TILL MORNING COMES AGAIN

DREADED MEMORIES RUNNING WILD
YOU WANT TO FREE THEM FROM THE CHILD
YOUR REACHEN OUT BUT THE ANSWEARS ALWAYS HIDE
YOU CANT FIND YOUR PEACE OF MIND
YOU HOLD ON TIGHT
YOUR NOT SURE WHY
THE LITTLE ONE CRIES
DEEP INSIDE

YOU TAKE ANOTHER SWOLLOW
IT EATS UP ALL YOUR PAIN
EVERY THING FEELS BETTER
TILL MORNING COMES AGAIN

YOU TRY TO LET GO
IMAGES SO VIVID YOU LOSE CONTROLE
YOU TAKE ANOTHER SWOLLOW
IT EATS UP ALL YOUR PAIN
EVERY THING FEELS BETTER
TILL MORNING COMES AGAIN....
Ó 2003 Debbie Alaric

BUT IT DONT KNOW WHY

Hummmm, comfortable numb. Great writing I like it. Ken