Hey everyone, I have been writing for about 6 years now. I'm no pro but here is one of my first posts for this section. It's a song that I wrote and recorded for a family member. Not only family, but a musical partner that I lost a while back. This is probably one of my best songs i have ever wrote. Read it..enjoy...
Your Song
I'm trying to get along knowing that you're gone
But I know that you were strong
I took out this pen and started to write again
Another song
You were my best friend
I can never see you again
You've been gone for so long
But in your memory I write diligently
Your song
Chorus
And i know that you are there
I can see you everywhere
Your life was but a song
I wish that you were here to hear the poem that I hear
In this song
In this letter I wrote
I meant every word and note
Knowing that you were strong
In every single letter
In every single word
I showed how you belonged
Another sad song
I've missed you for too long
This is your song
Chorus
Bridge
And I know that you are here
I know that you are near
Right next to me is where you belong
(repeat 6x's)
With this last song
I know that you are gone
This is forever your song.....
Powerful stuff - congratulations.
I'm completely blown away and getting a tear or two reading this. Please post a link to a recording if you have it posted somewhere. I'm sorry to hear of your loss.
Hi kchambers,
lovely song, well done. The thing that I like about it is the way you work the "..song.." into the last line of each verse, that really works well for me. My only comment would be that I wonder is this piece could do with less rhyme, of course when it is sung it may be fine but I was a just a little distracted by the predicability of the rhyme on the read through. Still thats not a major issue, I think this is excellent.
cheers
Paul
Excellent song, well done!
Howdy kchambers. This is a good memorial song.
I would tweak only a couple spots in it:
But in your memory I write diligently
Your song
I think "But of your memory I write diligently"
or:
"But for your memory I write diligently"
When I first read the line as written, it sounded as if his/her own memory was intended,
which could not be the case.
-------------------
Also this line:
I wish that you were here to hear the poem that I hear
In this song
To keep from rhyming "here" with "hear" twice, I'd suggest this:
"I wish that you were here to hear the poem that I bear"
Kingwood Kowboy
Author of over 6,600 song lyrics
http://www.kingwoodkowboy.com/
