Ha! an appropriate title I would have thought seeing as I haven't been around here for so long. This song is a first draft, but I thought I would get what I had out there before the end :lol: . My intention here is to plant the idea that the world, as we humans know it ,is fragile but that planet itself isn't and will survive regardless of us. Anyway comments are always welcome.
Cheers
Paul
See it and hear it here: http://www.myspace.com/paulbradyspace
Out of touch
© Copyright 2009 Paul Brady
And the waves crash in
Who's to notice we're not looking
While the tide goes out
Sometimes I feel we're out touch and
these things don't seem to mean that much
to you
to me
So we raise our voice
Above the breakers no ones listening
Our economies of choice
Make me feel we're out touch and
And these things just seem to mean too much
to you
to me
<Lead break>
And who's to say what's truth or lie
Like repent repent the end is nigh
Or save the whale and save your soul
The one has knowledge of the whole
And the waves crash in
Cos time and tide will wait for no man
Drawing lines across the sand
Sometimes I feel we're out touch and
these things don't seem to mean that much
Hey Paul
Talk about "Out of Touch " , sorry my lack of posting and replying has been zero this year , { health issues }
I really like what you have here , tho this does comes with a but ...
Don't ya hate a but ... :lol:
The repeat on the word repent is my only sticking point and I realize there is a pause between it aka
Like repent .......
repent the end is nigh
Well thats how I see it , I was wondering would it be better if the 2nd repent was replaced with already
Like repent , already the end is nigh
Just my initial thoughts when I read it ...
Great writing as always Paul
Trev... :note1:
Here is to you as good as you are
And here is to me as bad as I am
As good as you are and as bad as I am
I'm as good as you are as bad as I am
Hi Trev,
How are you feeling now after your op ?
I've been out of touch mainly because of the live stuff I've been doing this year. My mate and I do an open mike set (generally about 5 songs) every two weeks, but more recently we did a 40 minute gig at a local café. Our first paid gig, even though it was entry by koha and we were billed with 2 other bands we still managed to walk out with enough for a few beers and a snack. We played 11 songs in total 5 of which were SSG derivatives. “Long Timeâ€, “Still Blueâ€, “I know youâ€, “Going Places†and “Calorie Commandoes†.
About the song, the repent repent line in the bridge will probably run together without a pause, but to be honest I haven't resolved this musically yet so I don't really know how it will go.
Thanks for the feedback
Paul
My back is still no good have to wait till the 20 th of May to visit another surgeon
Cheers
Trev... :note1:
Here is to you as good as you are
And here is to me as bad as I am
As good as you are and as bad as I am
I'm as good as you are as bad as I am
Hi Paul,
My mate and I do an open mike set (generally about 5 songs) every two weeks,
That's great to hear. :D
I like a lot of the lines you have going on :D .....I am not sure I would have ended up with the same interpretation if I hadn't read your background on the song, but that is not a bad thing....and I like the "repent, repent" repetition....it fits the street preacher stereo type.
I look forward to the listen.
James
Hey Paul.
I would also say that I didn't get the message that you intended.
That the planet will survive . . . despite us.
The closest you come to that is "time and tide wait for no man"
I think you need more lines like that to make that point.
Lines like
"And the world will still turn without us . . . tides change, seasons still come and go . . .
or maybe something apocolyptic . . .
the earth will shrug; lands will quake and mountains crumble, . . .
the earth will sigh; winds will carry waves over deserts . . . that type of thing.
Yeh, Earth gets revenge type thing. :mrgreen:
"Our economies of choice" doesn't seem right.
None of us really have too much choice about what economy we have.
Maybe . . . "Our choices of what's important"? Our priorities?
or how about,
"Governments that bind us"?
Well, that was a few thoughts I had, anyway.
KR2
It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.
great to see you Paul and Trev! :D
yay for the concerts and fingers crossed for the health!
like the idea and especially
And the waves crash in
Cos time and tide will wait for no man
Drawing lines across the sand
had though of a similar direction first, though not that the world will survive us but that it will end without us, long after us (when the sun dies) and, thus, our individual "end of the world"s are immaterial ... guess it's not showing at all in my lyrics because i took out the last couplet :lol:
cheers,
straycat.
"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin
I'm assuming no relation to THE Paul Brady (folk musician), but this has a really nice kind of Jack Johnson feel to it. Great write.
Take care,
Casey
Thanks James, I guess its interesting to see how as song starts with one idea in mind and can change into something else.
Hi Ken, yes you are quite right that last verse is really the only place in the song that is close to imparting that idea, the rest of the song is more about the parallel truths. The planets and ours. The “economies of choice†line to be honest I wasn't really sure about that one, it is supposed to allude to the things that we a humans tend to concentrate on, money certainly, but also the management of resources and things.
Thanks for the feedback.
Hi Anne, thanks for the feedback, that last verse reminds me of the original “Planet of the apes†movie where the statue of liberty is seen buried in the sand.
Thanks Shady, correct no relation to the other guy I wouldn't mind being able to do what he does though. I'm also a great fan of Jack Johnson.
Cheers
Paul
I finally managed to record this song albeit a live version and not my normal "in my living room" version. Ive also changed the words slightly. You can see this song as performed by "Rated PG" (the name we use when playing together) by clicking on the "Out of Touch" youtube link from my myspace page http://www.myspace.com/paulbradyspace .
cheers
Paul
Hey Paul,
Sounding good :D The chord pattern Em A gets a bit repetitive. Consider something like Em A C G and/or throw in a B7 for tension.
Thanks for sharing.
James
