Here it is, I tried some experimentation with Garageband, use Garageband drum track, I played an acoustic tuned to open C#dim for the chord strums (with reverb for that acoustic and vocal). I added bass and lead.
Here is a link to the rough demo for the song:
http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=11515299
Sackcloth sheets, institution socks
Muscles ignore the brain calls
Heart beats in time with the clock
Echoes off the tile floor and brick walls
Echoes sing insane saying she's lost it
Stale paint smell won't show the way to be okay
Quit running the race because of the cost of it
Brother cries no the day the chaplain prays
Echoes certify crazy in a shattered brain
Creaking floors and squeaking doors shifting weight
Oak tree sways cardinal song plays to a fate
Some call it an asylum, some call it humane
Some call it sad, a song for the insane
Echoes a lab coat a daily report
Nurses speak kindly with a singing voice
A distant whistle the sound of a train
Echoes off the glass windowpane
Cardinal stopped singing when it started to rain
An incomplete song for the insane
All comments are welcome.
Hi Andy,
I like it :D ...I think I do like the concrete images. I did have to paint in my own imagination on what the asylum was like which highlights "sense writing" benefits; guided by your words of course. :wink:
I played an acoustic tuned to open C#dim
I knew we'd be in for something different when I saw the open tuning :wink:
My only musical suggestion would be to put in some more "sound effects" One you could try is strumming your pic on the strings above the nut on the guitar (up where the strings go into the tuning pegs) that always give a very disharmonious sound.
Lyrically you have a bit of a grammar correction between singular and plural here:
Nurses speak kindly with a singing voice
could be Nurses speak kindly with singing voiceS.....or......A nurse speaks kindly with a singing voice
I like how the last two verses end with "a song for the insane"......had you considered doing it for all the verses?
Also all the verses start with Echoes except the 1st but the 1st has Echoes as the last line.....is there a reason for the shift in structure?
Good job :D Thanks for sharing.
James
Very creative approach. I liked the tuning and the effects on your voice. It all fit the mood.
Re the grammar
I think the following is valid:
"Nurses speak kindly with a singing voice"
because "kindly with a singing voice" is describing the way the nurses speak. Same as you could say "sailors walk with a rolling gait". I think....
Cheers,
HagRider
I had read a suggestion/challenge in Acoustic Guitar magazine to use a dim chord and it struck me to use it here. The tuning is C#GC#EGC# (up a half step from open C on 1st, 4th and 6th strings), for anyone interested. I'm not overly attached to the nurses line, but was going for an ambiguous point of view, I can see it working both ways. Thanks for the comments and listen!
