Hi. First chose Neil Young's "Prairie Wind", but then felt like cheating as I had a "seaward wind" last week (although you might say they make the first two parts of a triology :lol: ) - that's why I tried Okkervil River's "It End with a Fall", too.
prairie wind
i went to sleep on a pillow in the square
of a city that only allows passing through
and the scenery splintered in the sunlight
he fired three shots
and I could merely nod
as the sky hid his face in the dust
and the high rises sang through their empty windows
like through gaping holes in a roadside piano
the wind moved all the strings for just one note
of profound solitude
It Ends with a Fall
Well, he's been pointing north
Since the night he was lost
In a seaside town
Where his father was born
And every trench coat stranger
Replied “I barely hear you,
Speak up, me boy, or if you want to do something of value
Then turn this way and claim yourself a placeâ€
When he shyly asked whether
They knew the beat of his heart
‘Cause it'd been mumbling
Like static on the radio
And he could no longer tune in
On the right show
That had simply told him
“Come homeâ€
Now those strangers were always in a hurry
And he'd never been quite sure if they spoke the truth
So he's keeping one arm out lest he forgets their directions
And is waiting for a familiar bird with his ornithologist's reference book
A familiar bird or a familiar footfall to follow
Back home
And each day I peer out of our window
I can't escape the feeling to have already seen this
Backwards or forwards, you can't know but
These stories, they all end with a fall
Bit clumsy in places, especially the second piece... :roll:
Any comments are, as always, welcome :D
Cheers,
straycat.
"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin
Now those strangers were always in a hurry
And he'd never been quite sure if they spoke the truth
So he's keeping one arm out lest he forgets their directions
And is waiting for a familiar bird with his ornithologist's reference book
A familiar bird or a familiar footfall to follow
Back home
I bet a clockmaker would love to peer into your head to see what makes you tick, Straycat.
It's always interesting to see what you are going to come up with.
Something different that is for sure.
I really like the second one.
Are the birds the ones who ate the bread crumbs that he left to find his way back home?
Just kidding of course.
But I am curious as to why the bird . . .
but I'm NOT the clockmaker! Umm well err.. I am curious.
But don't mind me. Cryptic is thought provoking . . . . and from females . . . adds a mystique.
Couldn't get a handle on the first one though . . .
but got the visual of the holey piano.
I even thought of a "note of discord" (instead of solitude) but that would be too punny.
Solitude, huh? That has got to be in a minor key.
KR2 (Don't like those evil trench coat strangers)
It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.
Hi straycat,
Prairie wind, is an interesting title considering the mental image that it evokes for me. When I read this I see a dawn setting with the sun just rising and an explosion in slow motion with shards of glass refracting the morning sun with gaping holes where the windows were and tall silhouettes of buildings. An eerie sound of loss and solitude in the aftermath of the boom. Not quite 3 shots but it works for me.
Incidentally as I'm writing this the sun is rising over the hill across the harbour in the distance and I'm sitting at my desk in the office looking out my window.
It ends with a fall.
I'm with you for most of the way but like KR2 I stumble on the bird lines, well specifically the ornithologist line. I think the “A familiar bird… to follow….†line is fine and probably all you need here ie. “And is waiting for a familiar bird or familiar footfall to followâ€. The “ornithologist reference book†for me feels a bit cumbersome. I like the 3rd person to 1st person switch at the end finishing nicely with the title line.
Cheers
Paul
please, excuse the late reply :wink:
thank you both very much for your comments!
glad they pieces did something for you (more or less :wink: ) and i love the things you see.
yes, the ornithologist seems a bit odd, i see. but i liked the idea of the boy flipping through his reference book (one-handedly, of course) to see which bird is from his home area.
Ken, your "discord" strikes a chord with me :D very nice!
thanks again.
cheers,
straycat. (yes, aren't those trench coat strangers scary :wink: )
"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin
Glad this got bumped, as I didn't see it before.
Lovely imagery. :)
Chris
