Ms. Keeto
http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=7189768
I could have taken another train
I could have braved the monsoon rain
and walked home alone
A kind of fever came over me sharing my umbrella
At quarter past three with her
I trusted her even when she said she was a little needy
Ms. Keeto
I let her in why'd she have to go and be so greedy
Ms. Keeto
Sweating naked on the floor
Prayers and curses behind closed doors
She gave me more than I bargained for
Ms. Keeto
How can I forgive what I can'i forget?
How can I pretend that I don't regret?
How could I neglect and not foresee?
How could I forewarn the other men like me?
I took a chance when she said her deeds were done in secret
Ms. Keeto
We had our dance not much of a show
I was one of many in a long long row
Ms. Keeto
Every lie she whispered here
Numbing my brain tickling my ear
She gave me more than I bargained for
Ms. Keeto
How can I forgive what I can't forget?
How can I pretend that I don't regret?
How could I neglect and not foresee?
How could I forewarn the other men like me?
A harbinger flying in my room
Aging me 20 years too soon
She comes and goes and takes what she pleases
Her taste on my tongue's like a bad disease -yeah
She gave me more than I bargained for
Ms. Keeto
.
It's about malaria?
Or tertiary syphilis?
"Be good at what you can do" - Fingerbanger"
I have always felt that it is better to do what is beautiful than what is 'right'" - Eliot Fisk
Wedding music and guitar lessons in Essex. Listen at: http://www.rollmopmusic.co.uk
Intriguing melody, James.
Kind of reminds me of an old James Bond movie theme song . . . Goldfinger?
How did you come up with that melody?
Only thing I could think of is changing:
She comes and goes and does as she pleases
Her taste on my tongue's like a bad disease -yeah
to
She comes and goes and takes what she pleases
And leaves me with nothing but her diseases
Good job. Another . . . solid entry.
KR2
It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.
Intriguing melody, James.
Kind of reminds me of an old James Bond movie theme song . . . Goldfinger?
How did you come up with that melody?
Ken,
Thanks for your comments :D .... I was trying to think of something along the lines of Linkin Park or Foo Fighters...(trying very consciously to not revive a "happy samurai" for Chris' sake :lol: )
... I wasn't thinking James Bond"ish" but that's the second time it seems to have possibly crept up...I think it has something to do with the way I am using the half steps in my chord progressions to build tension.
(Jan 3, 09)...I forgot until now, but I had done the chorus first and when I was thinking about the verse, I drew upon Rush's "Broons Bane"...it's always been a fascinating chord progression to me...here is someone playing it on Youtube if you haven't heard it before
http://nl.youtube.com/watch?v=kqg1IbZm_sQ&feature=related
It's about malaria?
Or tertiary syphilis?
Good guesses, Alan! :D **applause** Closer with the first one, but your second guess is definitely alluded to as the "on the surface" type answer using the artistic license. :wink:
...the song is for Ms. Keeto a.k.a. mosquito...the one who gave me dengue fever in Sept. 08...not a fun experience at all :shock:
James
Cheers. Nicely done
A :-)
"Be good at what you can do" - Fingerbanger"
I have always felt that it is better to do what is beautiful than what is 'right'" - Eliot Fisk
Wedding music and guitar lessons in Essex. Listen at: http://www.rollmopmusic.co.uk
Cheers. Nicely done A :-)
+1 from me.....
Cleverly put together....I got the malaria references (although they turned out to be dengue fever) but I'm totally lost with all the syph references.....always been a good boy, me.
One thing I would point out....only a little thing (but then, aren't mosquitos, and look at the damage those little buggers can do!) ...you're singing "Miss Keeto" - to me, it should be Miz Keeto (at least, that's how I'd pronounce it...) for, if nothing else, a bit of onomatopaeia (hope I've got that right!)....words that sound like the image they supposed to conjure up. "Sussurating Surf" - the esses give the sound of waves on the beach, and so on.
"You can't call the British Queen Liz,
T'aint as nice as Elizabeth is,
But I think that the Queen,
Would be even less keen,
To be referred to as Ms."
(Although a copywriter would read that last line as, "To be referred to as manuscript." Confusing language, English, innit!)
Anyway, on the whole James, if I was a teacher marking this, I wouldn't have to take a red pen (or green, from what I've read this week - mustn't upset the poor little poppets by even remotely suggesting they got the answer wrong! jeez, I wonder how the kids of today would have got on at my school - 7 years old, it was ruler-over-the-knuckles time if we weren't word perfect on the catechism!) to any of this - reads well, nice slant on the subject, cleverly written. Definitely up there in the "A's".....you're rapidly becoming an asset to this little corner of GN. Stick around....we like you!
:D :D :D
Vic
"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)
Vic,
Good ear... :D Back to Pronunciation 101 for me :lol: I hardly ever say Ms. but rather Miss or Mrs. so, it's probably due to my lack of concentration on the pronunciation...while trying to not flub up the chords and words too much :wink: ...I might have another go at it later.
Thanks again for your encouragement.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
James
Hey James
Wow - brilliant - I want to write a song that sounds like this one. Top Banana!!!!!!
Title - Definitely Mizz Keeto - really funky!
I have to say I was a bit slow on the uptake and thought it was a bit more promiscuous than a big gnat, but it still works beautifully for me.
Let just change 'Prayers and curses behind closed doors' to something more visually painful - 'Writhing and cursing behind closed doors'
And....'tickling my ear' - hmmm - buzzing/vibrating/humming/entering - what about kissing my ear/chewing my ear?
As for the sound - like the intro riff - an annoying little buzzing thing around your head - great - rest was good (and only 4 minutes - very commercial :wink: )...
This is such an excellent tune and song - I'm jolly well going to listen to it again now....
Rock on!
D 8)
I'm nowhere near Chicago. I've got six string, 8 fingers, two thumbs, it's dark 'cos I'm wearing sunglasses - Hit it!
James this a great song and I wouldn't change a thing. BTW Ms is pronounced "mizz" down here as well, but I think artistic license applies here so Id leave the title as is too.
Excellent effort
cheers
Paul
Thanks, Dylan and Paul for the feedback. :D
BTW Ms is pronounced "mizz" down here as well Yes, I pronounce it that way as well...I just don't think I pronounce it often enough :? Anyway, my Architecture (songwriter....he always thinks it looks good on paper) is happy with it, so my Project Manager (singer...the one who is to give the song life) will just have to practice, practice, practice a bit more to get it right :D
Dylan, thanks especially for the suggestions...and you are correct with both suggestions... both are stronger than what I have. However, I wanted to walk the fence of mystery a bit more about who or what Ms. Keeto might be.
For me:
more visually painful - 'Writhing- Yes, but I think it would raise the question, "If Ms. Keeto is a woman, what did she do to the singer?"
- buzzing/vibrating/humming/entering (too much like a mosquito)
- what about kissing my ear/chewing my ear? (too much like a woman.... :? ....[Oh, oh fetish alert :oops: ] :lol:... or maybe better to say not enough like a mosquito :wink:
Thanks again.
-James
