My clock says midnight
Your's says noon,
you want us together
we're two seperate moons
youre energiser
while im duracell
you go to BP
but i go to shell
you see the future
I see the past
Both of them say
We're sure not to last
Chorus
So give it up
the gesture was kind
but give it up
we'll both be fine
please give it up
our time is done
but somehow you're the only one left
---------------------------------------
thats all i wrote down before i fell asleep
I think its pretty good if not kinda stupid...
aka Izabella
Izabella
I think its pretty good if not kinda stupid...
At first I thought where is this going with this energizer- duracell stuff.
Then realized, Hey this works. Maybe change BP to Mobile for better name reconition. But whatever works for you.
I like the chorus. The only suggestion I would make would be to shorten the last line a bit to: but somehow you're the only one. This helps retain the rhyme and also makes a statement. Like I know we can never be but somehow you are still my one true love. I'd like to see another verse or two .
Celt
Ok, thanks for the suggestion. I like that idea. What I was doing was singing the last line without the "left" and then I add it when you dont expect it. I like the way I could go with what you said. Thanks.
aka Izabella
