Work in progress:
Empty sky filled with the
darkness of a moonless night
Lover lane is quiet
no one came to enjoy the endless night
Hi Jutie,
Welcome to SSG :D
You have a poetic start here:
Empty sky filled with the darkness of a moonless night- Darkness seems like it might foreshadow a problem for the singer
Lover lane is quiet-------Brings to question why the people there in general are not interested in "hooking up"; maybe a tragedy in the town
no one came to enjoy the endless night---------enjoy seems opposite of darkness; unless the singer will be a "bad guy" or anti-social......
or you could try a contrast of Empty Sky with Full Dirt.......or Empty Sky representing no clouds aka no rain there for
drought; hence no one at lover lane because of starvation like in Africa.
...........just some suggestions to take or leave as you see fit.
I look forward to your next update.
James
Welcome to the forum.
Welcome to SSG.
All the lines here are supporting the concept of "empty" and setting the scene nicely.
From here there are lots of ways you can go either metaphorically like I did or story telling.
Looking forward to see how this progresses.
cheers
Paul
