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week 27 "No one lives in the past"

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(@aerynk-mcavan)
Trusted Member
Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 33
Topic starter  

Angels and deamons battle
in our hearts and minds
which way do you turn to
what do you want to find

nation after nation
we all bleed the same
language after language
we all speak the same
the richest of the rich
the poorest of the poor
we all die in this game

(chorus)
no going back
no one lives in the past
dont take your chance for granted
it could be your last
Stand up & speak out
We all have a voice
hold your ground firmly
make the right choice

Dont live your life with wonder if's
and what would have happened had I
chosen this road to the left
over this road to the right
angels and deamons
our hearts and our minds
which ever you choose is what you will find

(chorus)
no going back
no one lives in the past
dont take your chance for granted
it could be your last
stand up & speak out
we all have a voice
hold your ground firmly
make the right choice

no going back
no one lives in the past
no one lives in the past
no one lives in the past

Aeryn K. McAvan

You cannot live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.
Life is not about what I've done, what I should've done, what I could've done. Its about what I can do and what I will do.


   
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(@purple)
Reputable Member
Joined: 21 years ago
Posts: 343
 

I really like this song! It can be tough to move on, whether it's from good experiences or bad. One really simple suggestion is in the third line, you could drop the word 'to.'

These lines also are a little awkward:
Dont live your life with wonder if's
and what would have happened
had i chosen this road to the left
over this road to the right

It might just be because they don't have a rhyme.

Good work!

It's not easy being green.... good thing I'm purple.


   
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(@slowplay)
Honorable Member
Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 420
 

What the...?!? When did we start allowing happy songs on this forum? :wink:

I personally am a big fan of taking tired phrases (like "living in the past") and turning them on their ear. (Unlike a lot of today's country songs which take a tired phrase and turn it into a hook.) Good work.

As far as criticisms go, I pretty much agree with purple.

Ice cream is a dish best served cold.


   
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(@guerillacharlie)
Eminent Member
Joined: 19 years ago
Posts: 29
 

Excellent songwriting, its nice to have something happier !!!!


   
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 Celt
(@celt)
Famed Member
Joined: 20 years ago
Posts: 2649
 

Aeryn,

Good Job

I'll have to agree with the previous comments about editing the second verse. The first verse is very compact and concise, yet the second is a little more wordy.
Dont live your life with wonder if's

Don't do anything to this line though because it is really great.

I find it interesting that you open with a similar thought as I did in my piece yet take it in a completely different direction.

Celt

My SoundClick Page

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" It's easier than waiting around to die" Townes Van Zandt


   
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