Tuesday 10:16: Tacked on a bridge and ending.
um..... this probably calls for some explanation.... I'll provide it at the bottom..... It wont work... but I'll provide it. Inspiration comes from some strange strange places... Here's an upbeat little ditty... from the perspective of an object...
"Et Tu, Buddah!"
I hate to interupt this..
calm and peaceful moment
But i've been called into service
to serve a lower purpose
And though i mean no harm
The same cannot be said for this most violent arm
To whom i am attatched
who started this attack
So I'll smile
Unphased
And put you in your grave
But I never meant to hurt you friend
Blame it all on him.
Just blame it all on him
Before we go much further
With this mindless murder
Know I never meant to be this
An unwilling accomplice
Doing him this favor
But perhaps you may come back as something better
Alas, whats done is done
You take life as it comes
So I'll smile
Unphased
And put you in your grave
But i never meant to hurt you friend
Blame it all on him
Just blame it all on him.
(bridge)
And this is not the answer
Though I don't know the question
He's given me this mission
Despite my best intentions
And now it's all over
And I'm lying on the floor next to you
And I'd cry if I could...
What did I do?
Oh what did I do?
I never meant to hurt you friend..
Just blame it all on him...
(repeat to end)
Ok... so I owe you this now. A long while ago a friend of mine was telling me about this book he was reading.. said it was one of the strangest things he'd ever read... the story begins with a man being beaten to death by another man weilding a statue of the Buddah.... This portion of the tale is told from the perspective of the Buddah.... I pledged to myself as part of joining this group that I would always write about the first thing that came to mind when I read an assignment. That first idea is begginings of inspiration. If you discount it and move on.. then you're already fighting the muse. The muse is a stubborn thing.. so I refuse to fight mine. Thus... occasionally... she creates something a bit... off. And btw... i've still never read this book.... nor do i even know if my recollection of his description of it is even accurate. What I do know.. is that the concept I explained earlier has stuck with me for quite some time.... odd... just odd...
-marv
Andrew Delaney & The Horse You Rode In On ---> http://www.myspace.com/andrewdelaney
You can and should buy my album "Scoundrels!" in mp3 format on amazon.com or iTunes etc...
You're wrong, Marv, it does work........
I especially like the line "take life as it comes" .......didn't hit me at first, then I saw the double meaning.......
Nice one!
:D :D :D
"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)
I'm left wanting more.
A :-)
"Be good at what you can do" - Fingerbanger"
I have always felt that it is better to do what is beautiful than what is 'right'" - Eliot Fisk
Wedding music and guitar lessons in Essex. Listen at: http://www.rollmopmusic.co.uk
I added a bit more (bridge and ending) as per Alan's request... Kinda took it in a slightly different direction and left the Buddah feling remorseful.....
-marv
Andrew Delaney & The Horse You Rode In On ---> http://www.myspace.com/andrewdelaney
You can and should buy my album "Scoundrels!" in mp3 format on amazon.com or iTunes etc...
Marv,
This is really good. The contrast of using a buddha, or an icon of peace and serenity for a purpose so diametrically opposed to it's generally accepted meaning, is very interesting / intriguing / thought provoking. (?) I don't know exactly what I'm trying to say here, but this is the kind of writing you do that I absolutely love. Contrast and juxtaposition of opposing ideas.
The added bridge and ending really set it off. I wonder though, if I like it so much because of the explanation. Without knowing what the object was, (on the first read-through) I was assuming it was a more traditional weapon. On the other hand, I love "They Might Be Giants'" Birdhouse in your soul, and I loved it before I knew it was about a night-light. Only liked it more after I found out. So maybe it doesn't matter.
Anyways, this is top-notch. Thanks.
-- Scratch 8)
-- Scratch 8)
"...if heartaches were commercials, we'd all be on TV" -- John Prine
42
hey marv,
well i only got to read your song after the revisions so i can't comment about those. i do like the job that you did. i have to agree with scratch, i also thought it was a more traditional weapon. from the title i naturally thought of ceaser so i thought of a knife.
i am glad that you put the explination at the end of the song. i like to be able to go into a song "blind" not knowing the writter's intention so i can make my own conclusions first. after reading your explination i reread the song and it did make more sense. at first read i was a bit confused about who the subject actually was.
i do really like your song, and every other song that i have read of yours. it is nice to have the contrast of the peaceful icon and violence. very nice take on the assignment.
just a general comment here. how good of a job of writting a song does one do if there has to be an explination at the end of it? i think of it like a halloween costume, how good is it if you have to tell people what you are. i don't mean that the meaning has to be obvious and in your face but it also shouldn't be so hidden that the reader can't figure it out. there can always be a duel meaning the more obvious one and then a deeper one. just throwing out the thought. someone may read it and it mean something to them.
i like the comment you made about going with the first thing that pops into your mind. you are right it is usually the best or at least the easier things to write. one should not abuse a muse. you don't realise how fragile, fickle, and how much we really love them till something happens to it. i am going to try and take that advice and see if it will help. maybe that is what part of the problem is. i might have been fighting and ignoring my muse too much. my muse must be in bad shape and that is why i am not getting much out of mine. maybe i should spring for a week at a spa for my muse, let it recoup and get stronger.
-to scratch-
now i like you even more knowing that you like "they might be giants". never knew what that song was exactly about. really doesn't make a difference to me for that song. that really is a great song.
sorry if i tend to go on and on and on and on and on..........
hey it is better than nothing right? :D
-CheapThrill
hi marv
risking to repeat myself over and over again: I love this song:)))
I have to admit I read the explanation first so I don't know if it is truly that confusing...
what's bad about odd things?it's just more interesting.
indeed, I'm very fond of the words you used and the 'rhyme pattern'(?)
to quote dashboard confessional:'I could die for the words that you say'
I read this after you enhanced it and I can't imagine the song without the bridge and ending...they fit perfectly
excellent song and great idea, this is one of my favourites out of your songs posted in this forum, although I like them all:)
*bow*
bluenightangel
"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin
Stephen King usually writes some kind of explanation about his short stories...they just add to the story, you kind of think "Ah! that's where that came from then......"
But the stories are perfectly readable without the explanation.......
And so is this.....
Works for me!!!
"Sometimes the beauty of music can help us all find strength to deal with all the curves life can throw us." (D. Hodge.)
Hi Marv
I have to agree with everyone else that you have written (another) excellent song. I love the juxtaposition of someone being brutally murdered by a symbol of peace and tranquility.
Its like the Film Ghostbusters with New York being trashed by a giant marshmallow man. Its the irony that makes it special.
I would just quite like to see a little more of that irony creep into this song.
You hint that the unwilling accomplice is a thing of peace who believes in re-incarnation but we never learn that it is an inaminate object never mind a buddha.
Any chance you could slip in a line about a fat and smiling statue sitting cross legged on the mantelpiece?
Just a thought
Beren
I'm one too many mornings and a thousand miles behind
