A little country tune I jotted down on my coffee break...
Still Talking.
I see your mouth is open and your jaws they flap
Why can't you, for once, just shut 'yer dirty trap.
Man, I'd like to give you one good hard clout
Your mouth is moving, but there's mothing coming out.
Chorus:
Can't you ever just plain old shut yer face.
You're just another runner in the human race.
Just once please use the brain that's in your head.
Bet you'll still be talking when your cold and dead.
You see all these guy's talking on the news.
Spoutin' off about other peoples blues.
Cut away to some cat kissing on JayLo.
That first guy's still suffering out there you know.
Chorus
'Ya say trust in me I'll lead you in the right ways.
We'll bomb some folks, outlaw all the gays.
We'll stand up to those who do us wrong.
But you'll blink one morning and your freedoms gone.
Chorus
It's funny you know?
Seems those who have the least to say...
like to talk the most.
"You want WHAT on the *&%#ing ceiling?" - Michelangelo, 1566
Hi
I for one like it , the only change I would make is ( YAP for TRAP ) because yap where I come from is something a dog does and trap can mean your big mouth .
cheers
8) 8) 8)
Aghhhh
Not only am I a senior citizen
I'm now a bloody senior member
Are you people trying to tell me I'm old or what ?
over 700 posts ( I really do need to get out more )
Narn
Good song !
I have to agree with Lotto King and say that trap would work better.
There is one small point I noticed on the second verse.
You all these guy's talking on the news.
Should that be.
You see all these guy's talking on the news.
Celt
Like it.
Angry, but that anger seems to be just simmering under. I would think a fairly slow song? Wouldn't mind playing a bit of slide guitar over the top myself but, never mind...It's funny you know?
Seems those who have the least to say...
like to say the most. - that's good.
Well written!
G
Listen Louder Than You Play
Thanks folks. I've integrated the trap/yap change and added "see" where TheCelt indicated.
Interesting how different english speaking areas can have variations in the vernacular. Here, especialy among the older folks, yap can refer to your mouth , as in "shut your yap" , to nagging or snapping at someone "stop yapping at me", or to what a dog does "Your dog always yap like that?". Anyway, just an observation on how a word that is perfectly clear to the writer can be interpreted in a totally different manner by the reader depending on experience, context, location of the reader, etc.
Thanks again folks.
Paul
"You want WHAT on the *&%#ing ceiling?" - Michelangelo, 1566
Narn, I like your song but I think any V1 needs to really grab a persons attention so that they will listen to V2 . With that in mind, I'd change V1 a little to get that attention grapper (in country)....
I see your jaw a flappin, lips movin with the breeze
You can't stop talking, you say nothin at all
Man, I'd like to slap you, that won't stop you
Your mouth keeps moving but nothin's com'ne out.
You get the jest. Just my 2 cents worth but I like the song...
Good work...
MikeM
"Don't get trapped by the tyranny of four" Rikky Rooksby
