I found the topic for W7 easier than W6 since the only rule was to rhyme :) But truth be told.. I don't fancy strict rhymes either.
The song slighty deviates from the rhyme in the Chorus though. :( About what the song is about, well it goes along similarly with Hamlet's "To be or not to be..." ;p Here goes:
The Game
V1
You feel the world, crashing down on you
You're giving up, and everything is through
You're like a time bomb, that's waiting to explode
Finger on the trigger, and ready to unload
R1
But sit right down and stay a while my friend
This is not the way to do it, it's not the way to end
I can be your shoulder if you need to cry
Everything will be ok, if you try.
V2
This sort of thing happens everyday
To ordinary people in ordinary ways
Some people just know better and give life another shot
Some people just give up and let go of what they got
R2
I just hope you learned your lesson well
So that when the time comes you'll be alive to tell
And say that you were able to survive
This crazy game called life, with your head held up high
C
So many people, so many problems
so many lessons to be learned.
So many questions, so little answers,
so many voices to be heard.
So will you listen, and heed my call,
please think about it and realize.
All you have to do is open up your eyes.
V3
I feel all empty, there's nothing left inside
So why be cautious, when there's nothing left to hide
Why even try, when there's nothing left to give
Why even breathe, when there's no reason to live.
R3
But I found another reason to pull through,
If you wanna know the reason, I'll say that it is you
By just staying there and being there for me,
You've opened up my eyes and you let me see.
C2
So many laughters, so many smiles
So many roads, going many miles
Life is worth living, believe me my friend
It's not your call to say that's it's the end
Just take the shots, and take the blows
If you never try, then you'll never know
You'll make mistakes, and that's a fact
But if you're strong, you'll surely make it back
So keep on living, and play the game
If you're lucky, it'll work out all the same
So take it easy, and take it slow
don't hurry up, you've got much to go
That's the way to play in this game called life
That's the way to play in this game called life
well you got the rhyme thing happening
well done
cheers
Aghhhh
Not only am I a senior citizen
I'm now a bloody senior member
Are you people trying to tell me I'm old or what ?
over 700 posts ( I really do need to get out more )
Indeed - impressive rhyming. You've managed to stick to the AABB form without too many lines being forced.
Depending on your taste in music, this might be an offensive thing to say (!) but it reminds me a little to 'Stop Crying Your Heart Out' by Oasis.
As such, I get this song as being quite anthemic - that repeated last line could maybe do with more than just the one repeat! Lots, I say! I can imagine a massive crowd at a rain soaked Glastonbury all singing their hearts out.
Good writing - glad to have you with in the SSG!
Gareth
Listen Louder Than You Play
thanks lotto_king. ;p
gjbrake, I'd take that as a complement. I think 'Stop Crying Your Heart Out' is a great song. And thanks for bringing it to my attention that it is a little similar to the theme of my song i posted :)
glad to be in SSG! :D
Very impressive and a very good song. I hope this song took you a long time to do because if not -- your in the wrong line of work.
"Don't get trapped by the tyranny of four" Rikky Rooksby
Very impressive and a very good song. I hope this song took you a long time to do because if not -- your in the wrong line of work.
Hey thanks :) Call me slow... but what exactly did you mean by "...because if not -- your in the wrong line of work"?
Most of the songs I've ever done usually gets done in one sitting... but that's the rough draft. Most of them also go through revision after revision after revision... which is the case for this one too :) So make of that what you will. hehe.
Mave
I like this. You got a good rhyme pattern going
The first chorus bugs me a little due to the break in the pattern
How about something like:
So many people, so many voices to be heard.
So few answers to the problems that occurred
So many questions, so many lessons to be learned.
So little answers, so many bridges to burn.
…….or something like that.
Great work. Looking forward to read more of your work.
Blessings. Olav
