Doh! -- I posted this originally as a reply to Alpaca's post from last week. It was supposed to be my stab at the assignment for this week. It build's on what Alpaca built on from Copper & Elegance. Which sounds like a name for a band. "Copper and Elegance." Or not. Anyways, here it is:
Added the second verse following Alpaca's chorus. I tried to hold to the imagery and feel of the first verse.
======================
If you were a guitar strumming from my radio
Would your harmony remind me of my distant home?
If I tried to sing along, would it be in vain
Or would it bring some sunshine to this black hole?
I'm taking a trip to heaven tomorrow
Visiting old friends that I once knew
Don't worry about me, don't think about sorrow
Just know I went while singing to you
And if you were a mandolin with light and lilting tones,
would your melody lift my spirit with the voice I used to know?
If I tried to play along, could I find her again,
and replay every line this time, but skip the final notes?
Thanks,
-- Scratch
-- Scratch 8)
"...if heartaches were commercials, we'd all be on TV" -- John Prine
42
Geee whiz.... this is so sad......
Don't worry about me, don't think about sorrow
Just know I went while singing to you :cry:
And if you were a mandolin with light and lilting tones,
would your melody lift my spirit with the voice I used to know?
:(
Very good all round, these are my favorite lines though...... especially the first two... well done Scratch, when are we going to hear some of your stuff, i am itching with this one, wish I has a mandolin :cry:
Go well
Ja'mir :wink:
I am a cloud within a cloud http://www.justjamir.com
you can hear my songs at :
