In the original version I couldn't decide whether the Angels were the heart and soul, and the Demons where the thoughts of doubt. In the revised version, both the Angels and demons are the thoughts (both good and bad) that conspire to steal the heart of the loved one.
The revised version sounds good as a very slow blues number. The last line of each part is sung in an off-beat sort of way which is why they read slightly different to the other lines. If I get around to it I'll record an mp3.
Original:
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Its Angels and Demons that fly with you when you sleep
They fight for right to possess you when you wake
Don't listen to them; hearts and minds don't often agree
That doubt will disturb and distract you; push you from me
Angels and Demons don't care where they play
Richest of the rich or poorest of the poor
They play with our minds cast doubt in our hearts
But don't worry baby they wont pull us apart
Nation after nation
Me after you
Those Angels and Demons
Choose who's after who
So sleep well my darling while spirits do their thing
Angels of good times, fight the Demons of, uncertainty
They'll not have their way there are things they cannot see
They cant change your mind cos your heart belongs to me
Rewrite
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Verse 1
Angels and Demons
They fly with you when you sleep
They fight for the right to possess you
But don't let them keep you from me
Verse 2
Angels and Demons
They don't care where they play
They play with your mind, cast doubt in your heart
But don't let them keep you from me
Chorus/Bridge
Regardless of you
Regardless me
Those Angels and Demons
Will never agree
The hopes and the fears
Are the same for us all
So go with your heart and be free
Verse 3
So sleep now my darling
Let those spirits go free
They wont change your mind
They wont change your heart
Cos your heart belongs to me
Yeah your heart belongs to me
heres the mp3 link http://www.soundclick.com/bands/6/pbee_music.htm
Hey pbee,
Liked the second version much more, and i will have a listen to the mp3 tonite, when i am at home. the second version just seems more concise, clear, and i look forward to hearing it.
cheers
sozay
currently number 60 in total posts... and shooting for number 1!!
Yeah, that's the stuff.
Good work pbee. Version two is much better. You managed to pick out a lot of the phrases that were either ackward or weak.
Nice guitar work too. Musically all I would suggest is to remove the pauses between line 1&2 and between 3&4 in the bridge. It may not sound good, but I think it'd be worth trying. Loved what you did musically for the last line of the bridge, tying it in with the verses.
Ice cream is a dish best served cold.
whats the chords your playing? i like the sound
Hey pbee!
I really like the rewrite and the song sounds great. Nice work!
Hi guys,
Sorry I've been a bit busy lately for SSG to reply. Thanks for your comments.
Slowplay
between line 1&2 and between 3&4 in the bridge
That could work, my only fear with that is that it might change the rhythm, but its certainly worth trying, thanks for that.
Xposed
Glad you liked the song.
Its played in the key of C#m, that is, whack a capo on the fourth fret and use the key of Am.
The verses are Am and Em and there are open string strums and hammer-ons in between. The last line of each piece is,
Fmaj7,
slide up 2 frets,
lift index and middle fingers,
lift the ring finger and do an open strum
then back down to Am.
The bridge is Dm and Am
pb
Well done
standing here applauding
bravo bravo the crowd is on their feet cheering
All that aside ( :wink: ) Ithought the guitar playing was very good very good indeed , vocally it was rather soothing , I must say I was very pleased and wanted more after listening to this .
Well done
cheers
L.K :arrow:
Aghhhh
Not only am I a senior citizen
I'm now a bloody senior member
Are you people trying to tell me I'm old or what ?
over 700 posts ( I really do need to get out more )
:D pbee
second verson all the way great sound liked it alot ....... :D
mystic
