heylo!
this is a bit influenced by the book i'm reading at the moment, it's called the Philosophers Stone and it's about alchemy and stuff, so yes sorry.
and i'm not actually sure if the prayers are unanswered or not, or if i should repeat the chorus at the end... and i think it's a fair bit repetative...
so yes.
The Philosophers Stone
i used to hope for the future
the happiness of love
but hoping, it means nothing
when ur hated from above
i used to pray for the peace
freedom from the dark
but prayers, without action
stay unanswered in this art
the philosopers stone just stole my heart
it tore it out and ate it up
all my feelings have turned to gold
and to me theyre never sold
eternal thoughtless end
i used to wish for release
escape from my thoughts
but wishing, bred more tears
with all the pain i fought
i wanted to feel nothing
the hurting was to much
but wanting, gets you nowhere
and you feel so out of luck
the philosopers stone just stole my heart
it tore it out and ate it up
all my feelings have turned to gold
and to me theyre never sold
eternal thoughtless end
i pray for hope
i wish for light
i ask for end to inner violence
...and its over
the never ending end
Mary- Jane
Very Good
I like it the way it is written.
I think you're on the right track and one more chorus would only
be repetative.
Plus if the last line was almost whispered that would add a lot of impact
to the song if you understand what I mean.
Nice Work
Celt
This is really good...
Um, this seemed OK, but I've never read an of the Harry Potter books or watches any of the movies, so I'm really not getting what the Philosophers Stone is/stands-for. (Admittedly, I represent an ever-shrinking percentage of the population, but represent it I shall. :) )
Ice cream is a dish best served cold.
The Philosopher's Stone allegedly changed base metals into silver or gold and was the force behind evolution of life and the power which unites minds and souls. It represented purity and sanctity of the highest form. I don't know about the Harry Potter book. I haven't read it either.
I like this verse.
i used to pray for the peace
freedom from the dark
but prayers, without action
stay unanswered in this art
Joe
that was awesome, i like the rhyming in the song, and i don't think you should add the chorus at the end again, i'm not sure it would be as good with that at the end again, so overall good job.
hey!
thanks everyone!
yeah the philosophers stone is holy grail of alchemy(the art of turning base metal into gold) and it is said that it holds the key not only to making gold but also to deciphering the riddle of existence and unlocking the secret to eternal life...
thats wot it says on the back of this book anyway... and its not the harry potter philosophers stone by the way... the harry potter book just focused on the elixir of life from the stone...
so yes
cya!
mary-jane
Hey I thought it was great. Anybody here ever watch Full Metal Alchamest? I've seen a couple episodes about the philosiphers stone, but I dont watch it oftenly. Great rhyming. Keep it up!
There's a thin fine line between hate and rage.
Now watch the line be crossed and break!
