hey.. sorry, missed two weeks again .. but now i'm done with all my holidays, i guess... i was at the ocean with my sweetheart and it was beautiful but is over over :cry: ... anyway, here i am with week#41:
shadow-boxing pessimist boy
shadow-boxing pessimist boy
i've been watching your troubled pace
quit excusing yourself with being “but a pawnâ€
It's Always Darkest Before Dawn
if you keep feeding these worries they'll spawn
It's Always Darkest Before Dawn
don't discard the brush once the outlines are drawn
It's Always Darkest Before Dawn
i promise i am the warmth, come closer when you fawn
It's Always Darkest Before Dawn
remember me when collapsing on the neighbour's lawn
It's Always Darkest Before Dawn
pass out, honey, if you must
then learn it by heart as you wake in the dust
as you accuse me of belittlement
know, i, too, been crawling on cement
i, too, have that broken accent
me, i've been wishing for someone to sing me this song
though i knew all along that dawn would come
it helps being cradled like an infant when you need security and need it desperately
no, you would never consent, would you, but i see
the shadows dancing behind your lids
the irregular breathing
the shaking
the panic
oh, my
darling boy
calm in my arms
It's Always Darkest Before Dawn.
not sure about the order of the lines in some places, but somehow i like this. even though there are so many repititions (which i normally don't do)..
what you think?
cheers,
bluenightangel
"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin
Hi bluenightangel,
Exceptional . . . . . please put it to music so we all can hear.
Neil
BNA
Good song! Welcome Back
One thing I might suggest would be to change the order
of the "It's Always Darkest Before Dawn"lines
Instead of:
"quit excusing yourself with being “but a pawnâ€
It's Always Darkest Before Dawn"
Try:
"It's Always Darkest Before Dawn
quit excusing yourself with being “but a pawn†"
It may not work with what you have in mind musically
but then it may.
Just A Thought
John
Hi BNA
Really good piece I like the repetition it seems to work especially with the proverb/saying you chose to work with.
Would like to hear this one.
Good stuff
Bob :wink:
You are what you eat, eat well
hey..
john, your idea is definitely worth giving it a shot... though i'm not quite sure if it doesn't change too much for me (i meant these "always darkest.." lines kind of as a reply, advice, support to the line above- if that is understandable :wink: ).
uh, guys, you're making me uneasy... i do want to record it ( as i want with so many songs), but i have no idea at all yet how. might end up like all the others- i never get around to it. might become a surprise and be posted in a few days/weeks/months... sorry for being so lame... i really should get things done. i'l definitely try, ok? :wink:
thank you all very much (especially bob, it's rare having you comment, and always an honour :wink: ).
cheers,
bluenightangel
"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin
This is wonderful, touching and loving I really like it. I too would love to her this it is real clear that you truly love this person be he little or be he grown. I can tell you he is lucky that you feel this way about him.
Life is not what you did. It's what you are doing.
that was very sweet of you, bluenotefla :)
thank you.
bluenightangel
"oh, eventually it will break your heart" - anders wendin
