Days that end in Y

great song nitetrapper.
the one thing to maybe change is "the smell of your scent", its kinda of redudant having smell and scent... perhaps describe the scent instead, so that the line doesnt just beomce "Your scent still linger"
maybe "Your soft, sweet scent still lingers"
sorry, i know that probably sounds a bad terrible cliched example but you get the idea.
well that was the painful part ot of the way, all i have i praise for the rest of the song... again loved the chorus! It the type i like to read/write, where the narrator sounds like they are getting better/stronger, and then the last line gives away that they are all at sea... i guess i like the contrast and the 'suprise' the last line of the chorus gives. very clever.
I like your bridge too, and the only reason i am going to suggest a different one is, well it popped into my head, and seemed a contrast to the rest of the song in the same way the 4th and eight lines of the chorus are a contrast to the rest of the choruses
Something along the lines of
"Im only ever all at sea
On the days that end in y
On Monday through Sunday,
And every single yesterday
The only hope I see
Is tomorrow"

Its sad sad, with a happy twist... i think it might sound okay against your happy, happy, with a sad twist chorus... tomorrow is the only day that doesnt end in a y... so its the only day you'll be okay...

Anyways thats my 2 cents... though i reckon with the amount i rattled on ive given you the whole coin jar, and i know how much i hate being give change...
Great writing, look forward to seeing more!
Sozay

roll up that change, here's the second cent

very cool, reminds me of supertramp, simple, well-connected lines.
Second Verse, second line, confused me, it's seems like "that" isn't quite right
I'd do my best' that I'd get by

"that" purveys some meaning, but you could use "and","then", or "so"

I agree fully with sozay's praises, and I would add that this has rhythm changes, not mistakes :D

Sozayand Snoogans, Thanks alot for the read and reply. I was thinking of getting rid of the bridge alltogether. But thats a pretty good idea you suggested. thanks again for the input. keep writing and playing. Nite...........

Well I like it - I haven't been listening to country nusic for long, but Twisted Fingers sent me a "Must listen to" list.....working my way through 'em, slowly but surely......

Yeah, these are great lyrics, in a country kind of way.......then again, they'd make a good song in any genre.......

So keep writing, you'll probably look at these lyrics in a few years time and think "God, what was I thinking".......in the same way Mick and Keith looked at Satisfaction round about 73.......

:D :D :D

I like the verse and choruses a lot...Not sure about the bridge.
It doesn't serve itself well to repeat love that many times. Maybe mix in some other words...just an idea

Lifes a battle in itself,
loves an endless destiny.
Thoughts can be so cold and lonley.
When you only have the memories.

That's not very good but you get the idea...

Other than that "Great Job!"

Hey nitetrapper,

These lyrics are good, like others have commented, simple and well-connected. And it's a catchy notion. "Only days that end in Y" I hate to be the one to metnion it, but the idea was done by Clay Walker already. see:Only on days that end in Y Your lyrics are original, and good. But your hook's been used already. It wouldn't be too difficult though to come up with another hook that has the same meaning.

-- Scratch 8)